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The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

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Hetero Male Dominant, 38,  San Diego, California
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CInderBlackWolf - photo 1

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Welcome one and all who have taken time to read my profile. Please read it all though as there is a fair amount about me mentioned below. Some things obviously will turn some away, some things will not. I am hoping the ones who decide what they have read and liked will contact me. Now onto the details... I am married. I have no plans to leave her nor is she submissive to me. We have an Open relationship, one that She wanted. I do not consider myself the most handsome of men. I am simply me. I do not consider myself the 'One' or even a great Dom/Master. There is a lot I simply do not know and am trying to learn and improve on. I am not "well endowed", I am of average endowment, and no, I will not send out cock shot as part of any message unless I am specifically asked for by a prospective play partner or submissive/slave. I LIKE sex. Lots of it. I enjoy mixing DS and Sex when I can. I am a Geek. I play games, I read from time to time, I do weird things. My sense of humor tends to be dry, twisted and often only funny to me. What do I want? Well, a play partner or submissive/slave who finds the man I am is acceptable and what is written above is not an issue for her or includes what she wants for herself. A girl who understands the average day is not always about DS or play, but rather filled with the quiet day to day routines. Well, ok, will have some teasing and light play and attention on the day to day basis. Sex, plenty of it. Some one who enjoys the rough play, gentle play, and anything else in between that may strike our fancy at that time. A submissive/slave that understands and accepts that my professional life will and does often intrude into my private life, but it something I choose to do. What I do for a living I will share if and when I am asked. I have tried to list the things I do like and don't like in the experiences portion of the profile and hope what some one finds there may be to their liking. I do however welcome anyone wishing to have casual conversation, be it about the lifestyle, my 'geek' interests or what ever else might strike your fancy at that time. Please do understand that sometimes I can be fairly witty and hold a decent online conversation and sometimes not. Hmmm, not sure what else are my wants but I am sure there will be some more added as they occur to me. What do I Not want: I am NOT interested in some one who simply wants to play mental games with me or wants a 'sugar' daddy. I am not interested in some one unwilling to learn or to accept that I myself am still trying learn and expand on the lifestyle as I know and enjoy it to be. For now, that's all I can think of for a start.











Last Online:


 Dominant Male

 San Diego 


 5' 11"

 230 lbs






Actively Seeking:

Submissive Female

Switch Women

A Poly Household



 Renaissance Faires

 Anal Play

 Canes and Crops




 Hair Pulling

 Knife Play

 Massage (Giving)


 Arcade Games


 Online RPGs

 Role Playing Games

 Heavy Metal Music



 Amusement Parks

 Coffee Shops

 Flea Markets

 Garage Sales

 Going to the Opera






 Electrical Play (Beginner)


 Eye Contact Restrictions

 Local BDSM Community (Beginner)

 Domestic Service

 Fire Play (Beginner)



 Munches (Beginner)

 Orgasm Denial

 Public Play


 Card Games




 Online Chatrooms

 Science Fiction

 Simulation Games

 TV Sports

 Web Surfing

 Gorean Lifestyle

 Lifestyle BDSM

 Country Music


 Horror Movies

 Curious About:

 Massage (Getting)

 Outdoor Bondage (Beginner)




 Photography (Beginner)




 Needle Play

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Journal Entries:
11/17/2013 11:45:57 AM

My thoughts on some of the girls of this site. Of course these are my opnions, may not be agreeable to everyone, but they are mine and my observations.


Why does it seem that if you try to be polite, respectful, leave a message that's more than some one liner, the girls a Male even shows interest in will not respond, and the very few who do are already taken? Well, at least that 3% who have responded had the decency to reply at all.


I see more than a few who list "Join Poly house" yet when a potential Dom Male steps forward to message the girl, she won't respond at all. Sure, most read the mail, or at least glance but how will they know if he is right for her without trying to respond does a girl expect to be part of a house if she is unwilling to be the first one to accept and join Him?


Is it that some one like me is married and admits it? Why should I hide that fact, it would be a lie to the girl and myself to not tell up front I am. Oh, maybe the girl thinks the spouse does not know. Believe me, mine does. She encourages me to try to find some one.


I don't know for sure, but seems to me over the last several months I have been attempting to contact girls that catch my eye, that I try to find out more about who she is, there is no response. I don't know what I might be doing wrong, certainly no one tells me.


Just my thoughts for the moment. I'll keep looking, maybe some girl will want to talk to me at some point.

2/29/2012 8:34:37 PM

Hmmm, been more than awhile since I poked into CM.


Most recent endevor with a Submissive did not work out due in part to distance seperating us and in other than I have little tolerance for anyone who shows any kind of disrespect about or towards my wife. She may not be my submissive, but I damn will will not have anyone bad mouth her or tell me what she can or can not do as far as anything goes.


WITH that in mind, I am once more looking for a submissive for myself that understands that I am married and that the relationship is an Open one by her request.


I am looking for a submissive who is willing to explore many things that either she or I have little experience in, and to enjoy more of those things we do know well.


I will once again be up front with one submissive/slave reading this: I enjoy Sex, a lot of it, and I will involve sexual aspects into play when and where I can with any play partner. If that sort of thing turns you off, don't turn away, I am more than understanding in that if a slave/submissive is just not into it that much, then that is her choice and I will respect it.


I'll update and make some changes to the rest of my profile soon.




11/18/2011 2:33:28 PM

18 Nov 11


Been on and off Collarme, looking at profiles, reading various journals. Many of them I fond very good reads and have considered taking quotes from them (with all due credit) and putting them up in my own journal.


Today I wiped all but two sent messages since none of them have considered it polite to reply or at least tell me Not interested. Ah well, it is what it is. I keep looking and maybe some submissive will find what I do have interesting enough to contact me.


Random thought, Rope flogger or paddle. Hmmm. I have rope to make the flogger, just I know I am not skilled at making one yet. A paddle, I can make that, just have to find the time and not have Co-workers around to ask questions they do not want the real answer to.


Edit: Just after writing this my most recent message was actually replied to. The very first in fact to respond to a serious message of interest of mine. Though the girl said no, it was a far cry better than getting no answer at all from the all too many submissive/slaves who claim to be looking but won't respond.  Thank you girl, you made my day a bit brighter.

10/31/2011 8:43:19 PM

31 Oct 11

Hmmm, another halloween night come and gone even though its not even 9pm here yet. Hardly any kids came by for anything. I seem to recall where I was last at, kids were beating on my door well until after 10pm. Huh. Oh well, I'll take the candy to work and let the wolves aka my co-workers at it all. That'll really make the Boss's day, Ha!


Anyway, been here more than a few days, been trying to message several submissives as I see them and not a single one has even had the respect to message back and simply say they are not interested. I find that a little more than dissapointing and displeasing. They come here wanting something, 'advertise' for something and when some one shows interest, not even the decency to reply back politely.


I was told this supposed to be a good site to find play partners or a submissive quickly or at least prospective ones at least. Does not seem to be the case yet. I will give it a little more time, try a few more messages, but if these ladies are that picky, they damn well should say so and stop wasting my time and effort.

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