I'm sure it won't last long, but, I am leaving, and, before I go, I'd like to share with what i wrote to them, where it asks for the reason : 

This site is rife with silly bitches, male and female; false profiles; women who rule the forum with stinky iron cootchies; and, the SUPPORT is utterly laughable. Goodbye. I hope you get shut down soon.

I know it is rather short and subtle, but, I do hope they can read between the lines and get the salient points, all the same.

I think most people have sub and slave firmly confused in their minds. I say this, as I just read a profile, again, where a person claimed to be a different sort of sub, but, definitely sub and not slave; and, why are they different? Because, they have a mind and a will of their own, their own personality, they won't just give in to your whims, etc;, but, they will obey, once they find the person who suits their needs.

Honey, that's not submissive! And, even more so, it is not being a submissive. 

A submissive submits. That's what they do. They need someone to control them, cajole them into doing what the other person wills, as that is how they get their kicks. 

If you're a female who does not want that, but, who does want a strong man who will protect you, guide you, show you how to please him, use your body for his private entertainment, and, allow you to fetch him dinner and sit at your feet, you probably are, after all, just a woman. No other title needed.

A slave has their own free will - contrary to popular belief- and they are expected to use their own mind. Because, with slaves, it is not about them being controlled, so much as them giving, sharing, getting things done, feeling accomplished. Slaves may submit, but, they are not submissives, and, they are not always submissive, either. 

Example: 

Tell a submissive to lay down on their tummy, hands behind their back, and, not to move, no matter what, and, they will not move, no matter what. At least, that is true, until you pushed them too far. Tell them not to speak and you better hope they didn't leave rice cooking on the back burner, or, you'll end up with a stinky house and a very bad dinner.

Do the same thing with a slave, and, perhaps they'll do it, if they know they have free time. Otherwise, they will probably remind you of the rice cooking on the stove, and, ask permission to finish dinner first, if that's what is going on. Or, they might ask for clarification on the change of schedule. They have things to do, people to take care of. Yes, they know they may get beat for failure to submit, but, submission is not their primary function, service is. And, sometimes service means being in adverse situations wherein you must disobey, at least a little, to keep things functional. 

Am I getting the point across? Slaves do not subsume their will to yours. What they love is duty, well thought out strategy, clearly defined ways of living. Soldiers make good slaves, specifically because they come pre-trained in how to balance their life of service with their day to day "regular" life, and, to be proud of their accomplishments, when they have done their duty well and obeyed effectively, whether the duty was storming a beach front or digging a ditch. But, look at them. They are not wimpy, they do not grovel, they have completely free will, and, by their free will, choose to follow either the protocols and regulations, or the person who has captured their heart by their ability to lead. They'd prefer the latter, but, the former will do. 

That's what a slave is. A slave will be told "Here are the protocols." and they will learn them, and, go on with their duties and be proud of what they have achieved, even if they have zero respect for their owner. It is not their job to love their owner, though it is preferable. It is their job to perform their duties well.

Submissives need to believe that whatever their owner does is right, though. Submissives make lousy soldiers, as they cannot balance the dichotomy of the differing lifestyles into one whole life, and, they cannot choose whether to follow the rule or the ruler. They do not think well on their feet, and, they are not capable of choosing their own path, then, accepting the consequences, later, because, it is unthinkable to disobey. 

Slaves disobey, when it is necessary. If a slave fully obeys your order, they are probably doing it out of spite. If they obey the spirit of your order, rather than the actual contents, they are probably doing it out of respect. Why? Because, most orders are given rather hastily, and, badly. 

"Go in the bathroom and fetch me the pink towel." you will say. However, the pink towel is not in the bathroom, but, the blue one is. This stops a submissive cold. You've just gone beyond their ability to follow an order. They stop dead in their tracks, or, they return to you for clarification. Not much gets done with submissives, when they are in mode anyway, but, they can be fun to play with.

The slave would go in, see the blue towel is there, assess the situation, and, then make the best guess, based on their knowledge of you, what to do. They might bring the blue towel, they might go to where the pink towel is and fetch it, or, they might bring you both, and, let you decide which one you truly want.

Again, the one is focusing on the order, the other is focusing on the task needing to be accomplished Submissives are inherently more selfish than slaves in that way. It's all "me, me, me" with submissives "I obey you. I grovel. I need orders." versus a slave's "Do you need me to serve you? Would you like some tea? Do you want me to kneel?" It's a hard thing, to see the distinction, at times, but, in the end, the difference will out.

You know, what I would want from a slave is not 24/7 groveling, adherence to a very strict set of rules that are impossible to live with so that I have maximum excuse to punish him for failure. etc. That is all negative. Why would I want to increase the negativity in my life?

If I had a slave, I'd want him to be fully obedient, when obedience was required - which is all the time in some ways, and, sometimes in others - just like when you work for someone, and, they don't want you drifting away to go play video games, when you are helping a client, but, they don't mind if you leave your desk to use the restroom once the client is gone.  

Respect would need to be 24/7, and, so would open lines of communication, at least to the extent of letting people know where you are, and, when you are likely to be back - just like when you work for someone, and, they expect you to be in at 8 am, but, you've gotten a flat tire, so you call in and tell them that you have to change your tire, and, you think you'll be about three hours late, since you need to stop and buy a new spare, as well. 

Potential obedience, potential entertainment, potential service, needs, as much as possible, to be 24/7 Which means, if I order you out of bed to wash dishes, nip off to the store, etc., you go.  Even if you have been allowed out, and, you are in someone else's bed, you go. You don't turn off the ringer and make excuses, and, you don't consult her needs before mine. It also means if I tell you that Wednesday is laundry day, but, then I switch it to inviting six dommes over to ride on your back, in turns, while cropping your arse day, you're going to do that, instead, and, still figure out how to get the laundry done, at some point.

The relationship, in other words, is 24/7. The actual duties and entertainments might not take that long, and, quite frankly, I don't really need you around that much. I have my limits, too, and, one of them is all about a need for private thought, and, another is quiet time, in which to work. 

If I had a husband, I'd say much the same, except, he had better never be in someone else's bed!  

If you are actively seeking something I am not, or, claiming to be something I do not want, I probably will not consider you. It does no good telling me that your profile just has a mistake on it - especially when I know you've had the same "mistake" for years, and, I've pointed it out to you, before. Even more especially when you don't correct it, never have, and, never will. 

The mistake is in you coming to one of the few sites where you can openly be yourself and express your desires, seeking people who will fit your needs, and, yet, still insisting on being a cowardly liar. 

Also, for the record, except for brief flashes of lack of control, which I choose to attempt to correct rather than make into a lifestyle choice, I do not have dark desires. 

I have light, fruity, let's all have a good, fun time without offending God or too many other people, in fact, let's help them build a house or buy shoes for their kids, desires. 

Now, some of you may think that means I am "vanilla' and that I do not have any "kink", but, that only makes you close-minded boring people, or, ignorant, at best.

I have plenty of interest in whips, chains, bondage, obedience, all sorts of things that would fall under some people's "dark desires". The difference is that I, unlike them, am not ashamed of those interests and I have no need to take that shame out on the body, mind, or spirit of others. It's all just good clean fun, whether shared by friends or shared with a special lover.

My last posting of my artwork, for now. These are all things that are all mine -created by me, owned by me - which I am posting to share with people, for the sake of getting to know each other better. They are not for sale, here, and, you do not have permission to use them, beyond viewing them on my profile: this is true for all artwork I have posted or may post, including writing. Ask for permission, if you want it, and, maybe I'll give it to you. 

This last one I am particularly proud of, as the majority of the image is from a painting that I made - acrylic, on canvas. I had scanned it, and, then, decided to make digital images out of parts of it, as well, as separate artwork, that is. To do this, I cropped them, added more "canvas" where necessary, and, added to what was there through digital painting. This one involved, basically, creating half the flower, making it look like it belonged as part of the painting, as that's how much of it existed as part of the painting, and, I think it looks pretty skippy. Much better than I hoped for, anyway.

And, even more artwork, of mine, created by me, owned by me, legally distributed  by me through the sharing I am doing right now. Feel free to look at it. Do not take this as an attempt to sell or give a gift, other than the gift of current eye candy and further understanding.

A photograph of a particularly strange winter day in the Arizona desert, in between Tucson and nowhere.

More artwork, that is mine, as in I created it. I am not attempting to sell it, or, persuade you to go find it, on other sites. This is just to give you some idea of what I do, with some of my "free" time:

This is a self portrait (from a few years ago), called Chinese Fan, which is a play on words, as the patterns in the background, and, on my face, were patterns I had seen in Chinese fans, and, I love Chinese (or, indeed, most Asian) cooking, clothing, furniture, etc.; but, also, I have (some) Chinese ancestry.

This is still a posting of my own, original artwork, that I created, and, which I am sharing with you, solely for the sake of getting to know each other. I am not making an offers, or, any demands. It is only sharing.

Digital painting, inspired by someone's blogging about India, talk of Lotus Eaters, etc.

This is one of a few different variations, actually steps toward the creation of a digital painting to beguile someone lovely. Some of the steps were beautiful enough, to me, that I had to save them as separate pieces, even though they were not exactly where I was heading to.

This is some of my artwork. MY artwork, as in I actually created it, and, so, have full legal right to show it, wherever I want, whenever I want, unless the site prohibits the posting of any artwork (as opposed to just commercial artwork) or for some other reason prohibits, say, the sharing of images.  Yes, this artwork is for sale, somewhere else, but, I am not posting it here to tell you, ask you, or, entice you to buy it. I am just sharing something of myself with you, for the sake of getting to know each other better. No, I do not normally preface the showing of artwork with rambling diatribes - lol - but, considering I tried to do this, yesterday, and, they all got deleted, as if there is some policy against people sharing their own artwork on this site; and, that, despite the many, many profiles that are sharing artwork created by someone else, who did not give permission for their artwork t be shown, too!

This first one is hand drawn, then, scanned for sharing. Scanning is great for showing you where all the flaws in your work are, but, I like it, all the same.

This is a digital painting. Please do not confuse it with digital manipulation. Digital painting means it was made digitally, but, otherwise with much the same techniques as one would use to paint on canvas.

What in the ...  I made some journal entries, yesterday, sharing some of my artwork, older photos of myself, some links to now defunct blogs which certain people might find of interest, and, they are all gone! So, are the other journal entries, including the one where I am quoting a man who says, in the quote, that he doesn't mind if I quote him!

This is crazy!

To Support:

Why would you guys delete my journal entries? I can understand the one, only the one, where I directly quoted another member who was insulting me, sort of. Except that he saw it, along with the explanation of why he was so offensive, and, he came back and apologized, so, actually, my post - which everyone has fair warning I might make, due to the heading of my profile - helped promote peace and understanding between members.

Then, there was the one from Rex Lobo, where he wrote to me, with great compliments, and, told me he wouldn't mind being quoted by me. So, there is no excuse for deleting it. 

Especially as many people on this site have journal entries that directly quote other members, in the same way I did, and, they do not even give warning, on their profile, that this is a thing they are likely to do.

The other journal entries were of my artwork, some blogs of mine, etc.  They were not selling anything, they were not stealing anything from anyone, they were not promoting anything illegal, and, they were not promoting any other sites. They were me, sharing things with the people who want to know them. 
So, why would you delete them?

hahaha Since I made that profile warning, I have heard from no one. 

How to get rid of a man in one easy step:

1. Ask /order him to do something.

Want to stretch it out to two steps:
1. Write something

2. Ask/order him to read it. 
Tadah! They are all gone now.

Well, one of them I was just truthful to, as to why he is not my type, but, might be my sisters. 

How do I make this very clear? Well, that's always the challenge, isn't it?

I do not want the man who announces he is here to explore his dark desires, who thinks casual sex is a great and wonderful thing ... 

I want the man who struggles between his relationship with God, his loneliness, and, his desire for wild, romantic emotional and physical passion in his life, which sometimes leads him to do stupid things, like join sites like this, searching for something he has about zero hope of finding - a woman who is dominant, without being a cruel horror; who has a high sex drive, without being a slut or someone who will cheat on him;  a woman who will guide him in how to please her, but, who will not despise him for trying, or, view him as less of a man for it; but, a woman who will honor him, respect him, and, be able to live together with him, in dual strength, supporting each other, respecting each other, sharing a life together, fixing their home together, and, absolutely, having a great deal of fun, together - sexually, yes, but, in many other ways, too.

I've tried, through many years, with many explanations of what I am seeking, to find a proper slave and I have now given up, completely. I have met two persons who might, in fact, be good work slaves, and, willing to be simply slaves, not lovers, pain sluts, sex toys, etc. Unfortunately, they are both rather far away. Two people, in all these years, is a very sad number to conclude with.

Well, I shall not repine. Instead, I shall continue with my other interest, which is in a full-on romantic relationship, complete with all the best that is vanilla, and, some of the less health-threatening that is bdsm.

So, what do I want? And, how will it go? Glad you asked. Unfortunately, there are a lot of variables that are possible, so, I cannot, in fact, give you a complete play-by-play of how it will go down.

For instance, obviously, if you are a dominant man, who does not wish to act in a submissive capacity, it will, necessarily, go differently than if you are willing to act in a submissive capacity or if you are simply more submissive to begin with. Yes, I will consider men who are dominant, submissive, or, very service oriented with a slave attitude, if their personality is compatible with mine. I prefer to be in charge, but, that is mainly because most men that I know do it so badly. So, I am not against being in the actual traditional female role in a relationship, if the man is capable of actually being the man, and, can be trusted to lead in a competent manner.

There are hard limits I have, both in things that are must haves and will not haves. 

Will not have men who are:

Bisexual

Homosexual

Cross dressers

Sissies

Into: water sports, scat, extreme rubber fetish, strap ons, dilation, mutilation, or extreme chastity

Pain sluts

Sex toys

Must have men who are:

possessed of a moral compass, with their own hard limits and needs

attracted to me for more than my size or sexual interests

willing to study the Bible and consider my beliefs

capable of holding interesting and silly conversations

readers, writers, or both

willing to remain chaste until marriage, or, until we see that it will not work

local to Tucson or willing to become local, and, able to do so very soon (at least for visits)

willing to make a commitment of 3 - 6 months time, wherein we will come to know each other and wherein they will prove to me that they can serve, or otherwise care, for me, and make my life a more comfortable place to be, rather than simply expecting me to cater to their whims.

willing to switch, at least sometimes, at least sexually

employed, in a manner that will work for them moving to, or, living in, Tucson

My life is a bit of a mess, right now. I'm only working part time, moving into a house, trying to effect repairs, looking for work, trying to get a book written, etc. Understand that I am busy, and, if you want to impress me, you won't ask for a bunch of chat time, or, beg for me to do this little only kinky  activity with you, but, you will actually consider what would be a relaxing, not being used for other's pleasures, break from the stresses of life  by way of help or entertainment. Yes, you may suggest such things as shaving my legs, massaging my feet, etc., so long as you understand that it won't be sexual (not yet), and, it will be in a house in need of cleaning, organizing, and, repair - much like its owner! lol

Sexually, I can stand giving and receiving a little pain, and, I can also stand that for other reasons, such as mutually agreed upon household discipline. In fact, I am quite up on the idea of living together with an agreement as to what is hurtful, crossing the line, behavior that demands corporal punishment, and, setting those limits for both of us, as I believe it bre-eds trust and respect. .. but .. back to sexually. I am very orally inclined, especially kissing. I think kissing, earlobe nibbling, love bites, licking, sucking, are the best active bits of sex. I don't need any specific bdsm activity, but, I do like aggressive action, or submissive action, and, I can definitely switch when it comes to that. Being given orders turns me on, immensely, when done right. Giving orders turns me on, immensely, when they are followed well.  Missionary is a lovely position, not to be sneezed at; bondage is fun, spankings can be wonderful but I prefer sensual to stinging. If you don't know what I mean, maybe, if you beg, I'll show you, sometime. 

Non-sexually, I need my needs met. I'm not greedy, but, there are things I definitely need out of life, to make it more comfortable and work better for me. Some of it is related to someone to do as I tell them to do, step 'n' fetch it stuff, handyman work, intensive labor; some of it is clothes and other things that cost money; and, some of it is related more to being thoughtful and interesting; some is more related to grooming. I can't tell you more specifically, without knowing what point you are entering into my life, and, what your capabilities are.

And, let's be real about this. This is my profile, about my wants, needs, desires, etc. Don't write to me, asking why it's all about me, as, that is the point of having a profile. Also, if you are under the age of 33, I will not even consider you, no matter what you have going for you. 33 is 9 years younger than me. If you are over the age of 52, you'd better have one seriously charming personality, and, not look all rickety. 

I do suffer from Fibromyalgia, it is true. Which means, in some respects,  I am slow, weak, foggy-headed, etc. However, be aware that my foggy-headedness, on most days, brings me down to the level of only being  a genius, or super bright, at worst. Once I was borderline normal/bright. I was really having a bad patch, that month. I forget things, a lot of things, and, I will have to ask you the same questions over again maybe. Don't confuse it with stupidity. And, don't confuse me suffering from the other symptoms as being lazy, incompetent, or, unable to defend myself. I am overweight, but, having done the fat analysis, it has been found that I have less body fat, by percentage, than many women who are much, much smaller. My weight varies, a lot, between 200 lbs - 290 lbs, depending on stress factors, or, it has done, since 2008. However, about 175 lbs of that, give or take, is solid muscle and bone. I am not, therefore, as overweight as a woman who should be 120 lbs. If I was 120 lbs, I'd be dead, or darned near to it, from starvation and loss of muscle mass. I have never been a weak little reed of a woman, and, I never will be. Of this, I am glad, so, while I do hope to lose some of the fat, you can take your judgmental attitudes on this issue elsewhere.

In fact, the Fibromyalgia, and, related symptoms, is part of why I was seeking slaves. I know what needs to be done, and, how to do it - with some fine tuning of plans along the way - but, I haven't quite the time, energy, or money with which to do it - to better my health, and, incidentally, my looks. 

If we are to get together, it will be that you are living here with me. I will consider you, whether you are foreign or not, but, only if you can prove you are real, if you can enter the country legally on your own, and, if you are willing to pay for a proper background check, with the provider of said background check being my choice.

And, then, I stopped rambling, and, waited for the great onslaught of fantasists and bots to begin....