|
|
|  | |  | |
|
|
|
|
|
Please read the highlighted 'Boring Bit' below before sending me requests, thank you.
Me
I previously lived in Manchester, where I dominated professionally for a while after becoming dreadfully bored with my stable and promising role in the corporate world. I now live in Huddersfield where I am resuming my studies for fun and have taken a low-paid job to support myself. It's quite a change of pace and I'm rather enjoying it. I have my own beautiful Victorian flat where I live in peace and solitude; suits my personality perfectly. I have few responsibilities and intend to keep it that way.
From my awkward beginnings, wandering around fetish clubs in Manchester, unsure what mask I should wear, I have found that the years have brought me greater confidence in my personality; no more the bumbling try-everything switch, nor even the young, try-too-hard Domme, I have settled nicely into my own particular "label", though it is a label that requires some explanation.
In summary, the label would be 'dominant masochist', although I am comprised of many contradictions. I derive pleasure in certain kinds of pain; the short, sharp kind - I regularly donate blood for selfish reasons. I also enjoy impassioned grabbing and asphyxiation, in context.
As for the 'dominant' part, this is my default setting. I do harbour a desire to 'give in' to somebody, though I am rarely very impressed and thus I imagine it would be very difficult to find somebody I could submit to. And even then I wouldn't do anything I didn't want to do. I do get ample amounts of satisfaction from dominating the well-behaved though.
I believe I have a true superiority complex. I do not see this as a particularly good thing, I don't even believe in my superiority logically. I know that there is good and bad in everyone and that we all deserve to be treated equally. This doesn't stop me from feeling a kind of superiority though. I suppose it's personal rather than comparative; I am exceedingly pleased with my lot and am glad I am me rather than being anybody else.
As for other attributes, I am well-mannered, friendly, discreet, private, quiet (pensive rather than shy), honest, solitary, proud and fair. I'm not afraid of being wrong or changing my mind. I have many interests based in history, philosophy, immersion, romance, etiquette, psychology and fantasy. I place a lot of worth in good manners, both in myself and others. My main priority is my own happiness, I intend to enjoy my life as much as I possibly can. I hope for others to do the same, whatever makes them happy.
I'm single, but perfectly happy and not looking for anything. That's not to say that I'd look away if somebody were to perk my interest, but I'm currently not looking to change my situation. I prefer my own company most of the time, which means I am not looking for any full-time or regular set-ups.
I am quite open in my journal entries on here so feel free to read them if you're interested in getting to know me better.
***Boring Bit***
Apologies for stating 'rules' here but it's purely for convenience and hopefully to help you decide whether to message me or not.
Please be aware that I am not currently in a position to session or make use of whatever service you have to offer. Perhaps in the future.
Please do not be offended that I was a Pro Domme, we've heard it all before and the bottom line is that it's a trade like any other - nobody forces you to partake in it and there are plently of other people here that I'm sure can fulfil whatever it is you're looking for.
Another thing to note is the amount of messages I and others like myself receive on here. I'm sure you've been told about it before, but I truly get a lot of messages that I cannot always reply to right away. I will delete messages I consider to be rude or cut & pasted. I'm not on here often so it may take me some time to reply.
What I'm not looking for: commitment, 27/4.
What I am looking for: amusement. I currently feel the need to 'use' and 'drop' somebody who would enjoy that, not somebody who would complain that I'm not attentive. If I make a connection with somebody, then things might be different. Otherwise, I am content to be alone.
|
|
|
|
|
Watch this space for possible session information. How exciting! |
|
|
|
|
Having to work in a customer-facing role really makes you want to discipline with force. Unfortunately, I can only use subtle verbal discipline. What I wouldn't give to tear somebody to shreds right now. |
|
|
|
|
In fact, I'd really appreciate a picture of somebody dressed as a Georgian footman (think powdered wig, satin plus fours, etc), perhaps holding a personalised sign. Or I'd also accept one of a highway man - I have a soft spot for those. Anyone? |
|
|
|
|
Since my last update...
- I have moved into a beautiful Victorian flat which is mine, ALL MINE! Mwahahahaha!
- I have successfully completed my year one re-take at university.
- my honesty has got me into some trouble, but I got out of it with my morals in-tact.
- I have looked at male escort sites, mostly for amusement, but I think it would be great fun to hire somebody new to it all - expecting a rich old deary who wants you to take her for dinner were we? Still that's probably my most appropriate relationship option at the moment - an hour of whatever I want, then send them home before I get bored of them. Not on my wage though!
- I'm ever more inclined to the idea of establishing an etiquette school for adults. It's clearly needed.
- I still want a team of powdered, Georgian footmen. |
|
|
|
|
Would you like to know what I think are the problems with this (or indeed any) scene? In general, people take it much too seriously. Specifically...
Lifestylers/Non-lifestylers - If you've decided to make BDSM your lifestyle, that's fine. If somebody just likes to indulge in it now and then, that's also fine. Why do so many lifestylers seem to look down on the non-lifestylers? You know, there came a point in my life where I was surrounded by so many BDSM-ers, that vanilla became the interesting, alternative flavour. I am not a lifestyler, I never will be. I want too many different things and I ultimately prefer my own company.
Professionals - People should (but never will) stop giving professionals a hard time. They are providing a service that they have invested in. Nobody is forcing you to give them money. You can get your neighbour to cut your hair for free (they might be good, they might not), that doesn't make professional hairdressers evil.
Definitions - "You're not a slave because you don't do this", "You can't call yourself submissive because it means that". Language is an ever-evolving thing that is used to communicate, that is, to understand each other. Words may mean different things to different people. As long as you get the gist of what somebody is saying, is there really any need to correct them?
I may think of more. I'm hoping that I don't need to point out that these are simply my thoughts, but there you are I've done it anyway.
|
|
|
|
|
Bored. Well, not quite. Been working an awful lot lately and have many things to do, future to plan, impending move. Just a bit bored of the way things have been going lately. I did have a rather exciting dungeony dream a few days ago, obviously I've been missing it all a bit... but not pro sessioning as such - as with any work where you have to deal with the public, most of the people you have to encounter are idiots.
Speaking of which, don't you hate it when you log in for a quick peek, then get rude, presumptuous, impersonal messages, followed by another from the same person whining that you haven't replied to their message within 2 minutes of deleting it? Fuck off!
I'm in the mood for a lovely shy man this evening. Shame you can't order them like pizza.
|
|
|
|
|
Honestly? I can't keep up with it all at the moment. I've had barely two minutes to rub together lately and with uni approaching I'll be lucky to get that! Not that I'm complaining - the time has been spent making long overdue visits to friends back in Manchester, nights out (or gym as I like to call it), social gatherings and juggling ever-changing shifts at work.
Again I've been thinking about the possibilities of sessioning again. It's just too unreliable and I'm going to need all the help I can get when I'm a student (and the only person I can get that from is me, as per). I have no idea what my free time will be like, if I'll even have any. Sessions are consuming, energy-wise, if they're any good, and I just don't know if I'll have the energy to spare. I suppose I'll have a better idea when I'm settled.
Rant about involvement in sessions coming soon I think.
|
|
|
|
|
Hit an unsociable period. Well, that's not strictly true. I've been going out loads lately, but only for dancing or seeing really close friends. I've not had the energy for strangers between work and preparing for uni. Only a month to go now, maybe I'll have a better idea of my free time then, although it will most probably lessen. Apologies once again for lack of responses, but you were warned about this!
|
|
|
|
|
This week is turning out to be even more busy than the last! I promise I will get around to catching up with messages, hopefully this weekend.
|
|
|
|
|
I'm really sorry for not replying to messages for a while, I have had a hectic past week (though it's been lots of fun). It's not over yet either! I really hope I'll have a little time to catch up on things next week. Oh why is there never enough time to fit in everything you want to do as well as those things that must be done?
|
|
|
|
|
Busy! Busy weekend! Busy, busy, busy! Will try to catch up with messages next week and provide an update on my successes at getting back in the loop.
|
|
|
|
|
I'm a little disorganised at the moment. Various electronics failing on me, day job getting in the way, university looming, etc.
However I'm doing my best. I don't have too much time for chatting when I've been at work all day, so sorry again for late/no responses. I may have found some premises to session from, but just sorting out the details of that at the moment. Bought myself a new webcam so should be back online in that respect soon enough. Desperately need to restock my equipment and really want some electrical goodies.
Flying post; must update website, reply to e-mails, drool over Charlie Brooker on that telly box thing tonight.
|
|
|
|
|
Having turned down applications for a full-on slave before, I'm now thinking that I would like one.
They would have to have no family commitments (by that I mean no wife and kids), would have to have a full time job (and inform me when they will be working), should have a car (and drive it well), live locally, etc.
Also I would have to get on with them, so it will probably take a while to find the right person and to be able to trust them.
Most importantly, they should actually WANT to be a slave. No applicants from people who think they'll get freebies if they occasionally bring me some shopping or give me a ride somewhere.
Now, I like my alone time. I like it a lot, so when I don't want to see anyone for a while, I want them to understand this. In fact if I find somebody who fits the bill then I would probably be more inclined to use them regularly.
Tasks would include picking me and my friends up after a night out, follow me at a short distance around a club holding coats and drinks, take me out to dinner or a bar when I felt like it, came shopping with me to hold all my bags, come over when I'm having a night in to act as my footstool for a few hours, let me dress you in a powdered wig to serve me and my friends ;)
Above all, I want them to absolutely love being used when the above activities take place. Don't apply if you wouldn't enjoy it, I want somebody who is more than willing to do the above. I know there are a lot of you out there, that want to be used completely.
I suppose that in the past I have not wanted this because it sounds like I would be taking advantage, but the more I observe of different types of submissive, the more I understand that this is exactly what some of them want. It would be a mutually beneficial situation - it would have to be or I wouldn't be interested.
Feel free to drop me a message if you think this is something you would be interested in.
|
|
|
|
|
Just a quick note;
I'm reading messages and replying when I can. Thanks for the interesting ones, especially from those that have gone to the throuble* of reading these journal posts.
I just wanted to write a quick note about what I am/am not after. I'm not looking for a romantic relationship on here - not saying that it wouldn't happen, just that I'm not here for that... or looking for one at all. I don't keep people very close to me in general so I'm not wanting anybody to relocate to serve me.
Sometimes I don't communicate with even my best friends for months at a time, so I can't guarantee timely or substantial responses. I am a woman of few words and many thoughts, so usually don't end up chatting unless something in particular has peaked my interest... or unless it's with somebody I can talk random, sporadic rubbish with.
Not meaning to sound elitist at all, merely explaining how I work so as not to cause offence to anybody waiting for a response.
Now if you're still going to get upset after that explanation you're obviously a bit of a savage and not worth the concern :-D
*I particularly liked this typo, so I'm keeping it
|
|
|
|
|
Hello! This will be another deep one, so brace yourselves.
Again, it's been a while since I was last here. To be perfectly honest, sometimes I just don't have the energy to be Aurorian... and I think I know why that is.
When I first decided to try Domming professionally, I researched, as much as I could... which is never a bad thing, I looked up all possible safety issues (for Dom and for sub), looked up all possible fetishes (although let's face it, the list is endless), looked up what equipment would be best to invest in first, etc. I also looked up those little tricks, how to behave, like using capitals when referring to Myself (see what I did there?), calling subs 'worm' (which I do actually quite enjoy, because I quite like the word), etc.
I now understand why most submissives look for older Dom/Domme's, because of their wisdom. Knowing that being Dominant doesn't neccessarily mean being rude (unless we've established that that's what we want to do), doesn't mean hiding away every essence of the fragile human being that waits underneath the glare. Although I suppose I am still quite young compared to most Domina's out there (26, almost 27 if you're wondering), I feel more secure in myself than ever and know I'm more grown up that 90% of the people I come across day to day.
Let's lay it bare; I'm Aurorian (for the purposes of discretion - I only ever use my real name at work, I'm still a private person despite being honest). I don't like rudeness, the simple day to day rudeness of somebody not, at the very least, nodding when you hold a door open for them, it makes me furious. I currently work in insurance, purely to pay my bills. I'll be starting university in September, a computer games programming course. There you have it, I'm a geek. I absolutely love video games (immersive survival horror in particular), I love fantasy lands, the rush you get from fear and excitement.
I suppose this links in quite well to my interest in BDSM. It's the same fantasy-land excitement I get from games. I do like removing myself from the grey reality we're often forced into for our jobs or other commitments. I do my best to ensure that my life is full of non-grey things, which has been successful, but I still have to go to work and focus/behave myself.
What I'm trying to convey, is that I'm done with personna's, it's the full me or nothing. I'm human like everyone else, with flaws and weaknesses. I think when people realise this about themselves they become better people. I am still a strong person. Being secure enough to admit/realise when you're wrong and doing something about it - that, to me, is strength. Having the strength to be who you are is admirable, especially in a world that implies we shouldn't be doing this or that. Common sense is the most important thing a person can possess, not intelligence or beauty.
I may have gone off on a tangent there, but that's my mind dumped into text for now.
I will try to log in more regularly and relply to those who message me. Again, I'm afraid I won't reply to cut and paste messages, besides not having the time, I'm only really interested in genuine messages, so please take the time to read and understand me, so that you'll know what to expect.
Thanks for reading.
|
|
|
|
|
Guess who! That's right, it's Captain Birdseye (the one with the beard). I think I've 'found myself' now so no more sounding like a hippy! I have a full time job now which is very... ordinary. However I'm also working on returning to education. All this, of course, means I'm unable to squeeze any extra time out to session. Not that I planned on that yet. My poor website has probably turned into a COBwebsite by now (sorry).
I cannot reply to all the messages I've received since last logging in, but thank you (some of you). Let's see if I decide to log in again soon, I might be in the mood for conversing for once!
|
|
|
|
|
I'm not up to replying to messages at the moment, sorry to those who may be waiting for a reply. There are some messages I really want to respond to, but I have no words at the moment... translating feelings into words is not my strong point.
Then there are some who want more then I want to give right now. I am changing and don't know what I want. I don't particularly have the time to go out to meet individuals right now, I'm trying to sort my life out. I'm happy to meet people at events I'm already going to though.
|
|
|
|
|
I am going to come clean. This is not me, not fully. I have split my
personality into so many different personas under different names that
I find it difficult to keep up with them all. I mean that in the sense
of if one day I don't feel like the icey, strong version of me, then I
can operate as the more sensitive side of me and ignore the other built
up persona for a while. This isn't fair on people who message me though
as sometimes I cannot bring myself to answer messages, I don't know
what to say or most of the time I just don't have the time. So in light
of that I am going to condense my personalities back into one whole
person, I don't care if I'm going to show flaws as a Dominant, because
I admit that I'm human... but I have exceptional abilities to work
through flaws and down-times, that's what makes me me.
So say goodbye to my Violet profile, I'm just going to use this profile for everything now. Expect changes.
|
|
|
|
|
Well, my life has been quite exciting recently, jetting off around the country visiting my favourite people. Unfortunately that lifestyle costs money and I am running out. And so we come to that thing I said I'd never do again - office work. Oh dear. You see I stopped doing sessions professionally because I wasn't quite 100% comfortable with it. I think I'm still settling into the woman I am meant to be and I would like to reserve my right to change my mind at any moment and do something else. Does any of this make sense? Oh well.
|
|
|
|
|
I really can't be bothered to put much effort into responses at the moment, especially when people can't even be bothered to use your name. I get so many messages that sound automated. If you don't start using my name I shall get severely annoyed and you don't want that on your hands.
|
|
|
|
|
I feel a little bored, slightly annoyed too. I want people to do as they're told. No talking back. No pestering. No boring.
|
|
|
|
|
It has been a while since I properly used this site, I have replied to the odd message, but really I've not had the opportunity to reply to them all. As you may have read, I have recently moved and things are only just beginning to settle down from that.
Unfortunately I am in a foul mood. Somebody has put me in this mood and I would like to rip their limbs off to make me feel better, but unfortunately I cannot. So I have been indulging in a little retail therapy, however I can only really window shop at the moment *sigh*... the credit card is looking tempting.
If you want a good shouting at, now's the time to ask.
|
|
|
|
|
Somebody just asked me what I'm looking for, so I thought why just tell one person. So, if you're wondering, here it is;
What I'm looking for at the moment, well I've been thinking about that. I am/have been a Pro Domme, but I am in the middle of moving and will not have anywhere to session. I've been thinking that I would like a good strong team of slaves to fulfil my every desire. I would enjoy this much more than regular Pro Domming I think as it would give me a chance to build stronger relationships and cut out the undesirable element (time wasters, no shows, etc). I would be looking for people well matched to me, who I got on well with.
It may sound shallow or greedy to say that I want all my desires catered for, but one thing I will not do is take advantage of people (who don't want to be taken advantage of). I used to think long and hard about what a Domme should and shouldn't do, then it dawned on me - it's an entirely personal thing. If people don't like what I'm about, then they don't have to deal with me.
I get so many offers from clients - housework, errands, car usage, gifts - and I have no objection to accepting these offers. I would be delighted if some well-to-do sub happily offered to pay my rent and bills, it would certainly give me more time to focus on my slaves.
Although I would like these things, I don't like to think that I haven't earned something. There are certain things I want to do with my time, such as improve my sewing so that I can make sissy clothes and accessories, fursuits, etc. There's also my kennel idea, which I suppose is a bit of a pipe dream, but not impossible if somebody wanted to help out with that.
I'm not too good at explaining what's in my head, but I hope that goes some way to helping people understand me.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
| |
| Age: 28 |
| Edinburgh,
United Kingdom |
|
|
|
| | |
