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rose13
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usemekinky
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Horrible at these profiles, but I'll tell you what I believe
I'll tell you what I believe;
I believe for a girl to be owned she needs to learn to be obedient.
I believe that being obedient does not mean you're not above the occasional practical joke, or being playful with your Dominant in public.
I believe that sex is an adventure. and any adventure is better when you do it with someone you care about.
I believe that just because you're a Dominant doesn't mean you can't be weak in the knees when your slave looks at you the right way.
I believe that you don't have to be a sadist to believe that pain and punishment are sometimes necessary.
I believe if you can't curl up with your girl on a couch and just enjoy the afternoon, you're doing something seriously wrong.
I believe I can be a gentleman, a nice guy and a romantic and still be cruel when the situation requires.
And most of all, I believe there must be someone out there who feels the same as me.
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random facts
1.) gor is a series of sci-fi novels that have a strong leaning toward female submission, degrading to more porn than sci fi near the end of the series. However the level of detail described in the books toward female D/s has created it's own bdsm subculture
2.) Some non porno films of the series were made in the late 80's including "outlaw of Gor" starring Jack Palance
3.) this movie is made fun of by Mystery Science Theater 3000 and is on youtube
have fun all |
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If you have netflix go watch "Tucker & Dale vs. Evil".....Go ahead! Watch it!....I'll wait. |
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well I got "Game of Thrones" season One and Two on Blu-Ray on Black Friday, now just need to find a time and occasion to see what all the fuss is about |
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Well I have officially "arrived" as a homeowner.....I got my first Jehovah's witness
....strange they seemed surprised when I answered the door shirtless |
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Don't think I ave reached "happiness"...but I feel happier thn I have been in months. It's not a feeling of joy per say...more like a feeling of relief. So even if I'm not singing in the rain, I feel like I can at least see the silver lining in the clouds |
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In a way it's almost comforting to see the same names everyteime i log into cm. I see people that have been on the site for years. Some journal about randome stuff in thier life, others about the date that stood them up, the rude Dom that won't leave them alone, or the loss of a loved one.
On one hand, I feel like a voyeur (and not the fun kind) Most of these girls don't, and will never know I exist. It's mainly politeness. In the eight years I may have messaged a lesbian maybe three times, and i don't message anyone whose filter will send me to bulk because they are owned, looking for non white men, no out of state and so on.
Heck i even smile when I see the same fake profile on occassion, I ike my neighbors...even the off ones
So to anyone that has seen me, wether we could ever be friends or not....hello neighbor! |
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to each thier own, but seriously, I bang my head against my comp whenever I read that " I don't want to be the leader...i refuse to be the leader...." quote...a nice quote, but wow not exactly original seeing it on a profile
dont get me wrong. it sums up female submission beautifuly, but if your going to steal something for your profile, try somethign thatdozens of other haven't used
ah well, could be worse...could have been something exerpted from "fifty shades" |
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I don't know why somone would be so hurtful and cruel as to want to ruin my life. I don't know where the hate and the ranor comes from. Why others would take joy in causing me pain. |
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ok,I love the fact that people feel like putting SOMETHING in thier profile....but still.....
if I see that freakin' "I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly....." quote in a profile just one....more...bloody......time.....
grrrrr |
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I wonder....those pet ID tags you can get fro cats and dogs....i wonder if you could find a REALLY understanding veternarian, and..... |
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Master Richard's place in Kansas City is closing?????? good Lord, knew there would be a reason for me to be depressed today.
For those outsde of Kansas City MRP is a fetish-friendly place wehre the majority of bdsm/kink events I've gone to was held.......I feel like I just gor the word "Cheers" shut down |
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grrr, my birthday in 3 1//2 hours.....depressed now |
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Argh, going to miss a fetish hypnotisim demonstration tonight....life sucks |
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I literally walked 2 miles through nine inches of snow, uphill both ways.....grandpa was right! |
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wow, what is up with people from Massachusetts? I mean I'm sure it must be a bad luck,and that not everyone there is the same, but everyone there I talk to there in the vanilla world sure seem to pack an attitude |
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good lord that was a morbid journal entry
still not 100%, but still miles from where I was....but wow....was I really that "emo"? |
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Life just continues to stink more and more, I've actually stopped getting depressed over it....after while it just becomes slapstick in a sitcom that's not funny anymore
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Uploaded a new photo...It's only temporary though...I HATE pics taken in a mirror, so I feel like a hypocrite, but I figured I should post one pic of me clean shaven...as it is a rarity
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I can't believe it...so many profiles are from Texas, California, Florida and New York...and not too surprisingly
but why are there so many awesome girls coming from North Carolina of all places? I'm so stunned I half want to move there
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And the hits just keep on coming
I may have been premature with my last post. Life just isn't letting up on me. Oh I know, many people have it rougher than me, still dosn't make how I feel any better.
Yes yes, I know, girls are very rare;y interested in "emo Doms"...and if life ever ahs an upswing I'll probably delete this entry....but I doubt that's going to happen
That being said, Don't worry, I'm not going to start tying nooses and listening to Aimee Mann. Suicide is like winning the lottery, something to fantasize about, but it's never going to happen
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thank you for those that sent me the kind words. suffice to say when I "wish to die" it's not depression, or necessarily suicide.....kidney stones
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First date after becoming single again, and looks like I got stood up....oy, not a good start
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Ok New rant, and this might be an old one, but going to redo it, just in case, there are a few of you who don't read past the first three journal entries
pics
#1 clean up the background, pizza boxes, laundry, unmade beds, I understand not everyone is a neat freak, and that's cool, but remember your pic is usaly the first impression you give, and I don't care how hot you are, and overflowing wastebasket does catch a person's eye
#2 nude pics; Don't get me wrong, I've seen some pics that simply want to make myself drool. But showing off your birthday suit is the lure you use in finding a fuck buddy, not a meaningful relationship. So I'm prety ceraint that reply you got on that one pic of you bent over and spreading your cheeks? I'm confident that guy isn't as interested in your intressts of country music, sheridan's ice cream and Jim Carry Movies
#2.5 I can say most of the same about swimsuit and lingerie pics...but at least your keeping "some things" secret, and showing your sexy side is never a bad thing I suppose, this can go either way
#3 for the love of heaven, the pics taken in a bathroom mirror on a cell phone. Nothign says "I need a pic quickly" like a pic you took just with ten seconds of preperation. I admit it's better than nothing, but other than showing your a blonde or brunette, or that you "really" are a size 10, is this really showing who you are?
#4 appearance; goes without saying right? though for guys this usaly eans a clean shirt, and making sure your hair is combed, but ladies? We know you can spend half an hour easilty in front of a mirror getting ready for a day out. Soyou don't have to get "tarted up", but you can sell yourself, effort is always appeciated even if a guy dosen't say so
#5 face pics...have two complaints here. One is when you have half a dozen pics of just your face and nothing else. What does that say? maybe nothing? But many girls...many MANY girls are self concious about thier looks. Even if a girl dosne't have a supermodel bod, if she's desperately trying to hide it, what does that say about her self-esteem? Not exactly a red flag, but I would defintiely place it as a yellow
#5.5 crossing your eyes, sticking your tongue out, making kissy faces....should NOT be your primary pic. Yes it shows yoru silly side, but it also burns that first image into a personh's mind....and makes it a little harder to pick you out of a crowd on a first date
#5.75 and for the love of...do I need to say it? SMILE!!! so many girls are standing there looking grim and emo. I understand some girls hate thier smile (I myself despire the dimples I get if I grin too big) But everyone can at least grin a "little"...this is your profile pic, not your sunday school picture
#6 lastly cropped pics. I understand a lo of you don't want to be seen by your employer, or your grandmoher ona "sex site" (then why was granma even on CM in the first place?) and you crop out the majority or entirety of your face....fair enough, but I have met nice girls who honestly claim they don't have a "full face" pic on thier hard drive. If your pretty sure your not talkign to your bank manager. Why not have one available, especialy if you've showed "everything else' in your pic already? I guarantee, some face fics can be sexier than the entire package
just my two cents
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hmm it's late, and no one to talk to...thinking about a new blog entry here, but can't think of a topic
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seeing more than a couple of profiles with shaven headed subs
not that it's a bad thing mind you....but what does the Dom grab onto?
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Just don't get why a girl who claims she's "not wearing any underwear" is supposed to be a turn on
I mean presumably the girl who says this is still wearing her outerwear. So is a guy supposed to be thrilled there is one less layer to "get through"?
Really curious what others think or have learned from others
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Seeing more and more of profiles of submissives looking for Doms who will "tame them"..."break them of their bratty behavior". Or "see what happens when they try and push the Dom around, will they push back"?
Now on one hand I'm glad some girls are actualy filling out profiles. On thew other hand, while I can understand a girl testing her limits, and the Dom that enforces them, I also can't quite unserstand a girl who claims to be submissive, or even a slave, yest claim they need "breaking" or "taming"
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I think I have what I'm going to call "White Knight Syndrome"
I can be a pretty evil Dom, there's a big part of me that really enjoys the wince on a girl's face as a I pull her hair, the way her body jerks when I slap her skin, the sounds of a scream that are muffled by a gag
But on the other hand there's the part of me that gets off on the trust a girl has given me to put herself in my hands in such a way in the first place. The kind of trust that just dosen't develop over a couple hours of small talk and drinks
Oh course by the time that trust does develop, And I'm ready to ride off to her rescue, if she's in trouble, but by that point I don't know if I can then feel "free" to put my teeth marks in her shoulder as tears run down her face
So is it possible to care for someone's mind and spirit, while still treating their body as a piece of meat? obviously many do, but it's a hurdle I'm having trouble crossing
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I don't use facebook, or myspace, or twitter. I blog here. Why? because any girl who will one day be "mine" should have an idea of how my mind works
But it also works as it says....a journal. I have over the past week read about some of my disasters in the kitchen, whenI found my cat and so on.
So I'm making this note to myself in the future. And hoping my future self remembers how horrible this weekend has been and that it did get better
...of course if things are worse off then as it is now....
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OK so I'm told I'm Attractive...but I'm not Hot(sexy?) how does that work?
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and here I thought I wouldn't have anything to blog about...
No responses or replies to fill an empty mailbox so I decided to go to the gym for an hour
On the way back at an intersection some kid maybe 17-20 comes stumbling out of the woods drenched in blood, seriously it was dripping from him as he walked
He comes up to my car and asks me if I can take him home.
"no, but I'll take you to the hospital" (it's about 3/4 of a mile away)
So I take him there, while the kid asks me if he's going to die, and if I can still take him home. Apparently he said he just "woke up" bleeding
So I take him to the ER and chill there for about an hour until his parents show up
I go back to about where I saw him, and sure enough a tow truck is trying to get a car that's crashed so far off the road all I can see is the trucks lights
so I go home and start using hydrogen peroxide to get the bloodstains out of the passenger seat, which I hope comes out easier than it does on TV dramas
...and here I was going to blog about girls and bisexuality
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welp..
...happy birthday to me
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One thing I've kind of avoided putting on my profile is that I've never had alcohol, like...ever. Not ever ye old communion wine.
It may make a topic for conversation, but kind of try and keep that to myself. Why?
Well for one So many girls seem to be interested in "Mr.Dangerous" that being a non drinker makes me seem a bit more....tame in comparison
And unfortunately, so far the few girls that have found it an attractive quality are the ones that have met guys that drank "too much"...and to be honest not sure how I feel about just being the "safe" alternative
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Finding out the hard way that a lot of gals online here are either Frosted Flakes at best or Cocoa Puffs at worst
why is it so hard to find my Frosted Mini-Wheat?
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There are two problems with searching for girls who "can relocate"
1.) lots of sub/slaves live in Florida, New York, and California
2.) It's hard to get a girl interested in leaving big city beach life for Kansas City *sigh*
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New rule--
I'm not smiling anymore
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actualy noticed that in my four years here I don't think I've ever messaged anyone who's profile had the words "lesbian" or "no men"...well one gal from Oklahoma when I first came on...btu think I've been polite since then
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good news, started baking my btterscotch chip cookies again. and no major problems....
..heck they seemed to be a big hit with the firefighters and EMT's
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Am I really that old that no one else remembers "Sex, Lies, and Videotape"?
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New thoughts about profiles
--If you have no pic, it's kind of a duty to write a fair bit about yourself. Having no pic and saying just "new here, looking for "..." "
probably gives the impression you'll put about as much effort in a relationship as you did your profile
-- If you have a pic, but almost no profile. it "can" work I suppose. A picture being worth a thousand words and all that. But you probably should think what those "thousand words" might be.
If your showing yourself in a bikini, lingerie or fetish wear...and thats it.... the idea your selling is"nothing I have to say will be of interesting, but don't I look hot?"
if all you have to give is your body, don't be insulted when that's all guys email you about
-- you have a pic, and have written a lot, but have said little.... These are the profile that say "fake" to me If you ahve a fantastic pic of yourself hanging by some dungeons rafters...and you go on and on about how much you'd love to have a Dom that will trest you right. or tie you up this way or spank you that way, but never ONCE mention what YOU like, what YOUR pet peeves are...heck give your opinion on "the Secretary" or for that matter "The Dark Knight"...
But SAY something about yourself otherwise your long words will seem pasted from elsewhere, and your "awesome" pic will make you seem less than real
--so my suggestions? your pic should have you when your lookign your best, brush your hair, put some makeup on, maybe clean up the background, and then write something that says something about you. a "personal ad" should be just that something personal about yourself. Tell more about who you are THEN what your looking for...
otherwise this becomes less of a "personal ad" and more of the "want ads"...and when was the last time you found something good in those?
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And the hits just keep on coming.
I am so tempted to trash theis "Archer6" profile and start anew without this "nice guy junk" holding me back
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Not sure what to type here right now, and truth to tell whatever I do write will probably be deleted in a few days...what can I say? I geuss showing my "human" side is kind of akin to shooting myself in the foot
But whoever is reading this, you may be depressed to know, you may not see someone again for week, months years, or never again. And one day you'll just be sitting at home or at work....or blogging on a bdsm website, and out of the blue, without doing anything but being a memory someone can still break your heart again all over
ok enough of that I need to flog someoen to get this melancholy-ness out of my brain
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well after needles, scalpels, and what I could only assume was a nutcracker, I finally have the tooth removed
...excuse me while I hammer myself into unconciousness
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Would you go skydiving....jump out of a moving (perfectly good) airplane wearing a parachute...if you were told to by a Dominant?
What if said Dominant said he would hold your hand when you did so?
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To the sub who gave the advice of swishing salt water for my tooth ache....
...bless you
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It should always be ok for a Dom to use his girl to relieve his STRESS from a bad day....
...But never ok for a Dom to use his girl to relieve his ANGER from a bad day
And it scares the heck out of me that some who read that statement won't be able to tell the difference between the two
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Beginning to see more than few sub/s;ave rofiles when they complain about Dominants "demanding" to be refered to as "sir", "Master" or "Daddy and probably a few other things as well
I have to agree with these girls. I smile when a girl refers to me respectfuly, but to "demand" it that way?
Little hint, a term of respect is earned, not demanded. If you need to have complete strangers refer you as "Sir or "Ma'am" that badly. I'm pretty sure the cashier at McDonalds's will if you buy a big mac
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First, thanks for all the nice emails about my tooth, it still needs to wrenched out, but the pain is subsiding already, so thanks
now my rant
Not so much in folks journals, but at munches, chatrooms, message boards, and just word of mouth I usualy hear non Goreans knocking those into the gor lifestyle...and I mean a lot
Now I was introduced to the lifestyle through gor, decided it wasn't for me and moved on. But of all the kink, of all thedifferent consensual ways a two adults can play. From dressing up as Scooby-Doo, watersports, having sex in graveyards toerotic strip tease-squaredancing. Does gor get singled out as bdsm's red headed stepchild?
I know it may be too intricate for some, and other feel strange modeling thier lifestyle after a sci-fi book series. But can you really say that one type of kink is "wrong" compared to yours?
"safe sane and consensual folks, if it's not for you, move along, and if you have to still complain about gor, or scooby doo or strip squaredancing...
...at least take some pictures while your at it. Hey wether I like it or not, dosen't mean I can't find it interesting to hear about
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oh damn...impacted tooth, so much pain....but not enough that I can't not stop to blog it.
Ibuprofen and a nap, here I come
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thanks to servilecat for spellchecking my profile, wouldn't want anyone to think I can't spellcheck my own work....oops
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might be in the minority here, but i don't understand why so many woman are showing thier pics with themselves in thier bikinis, underwear ect;
Now don't get me wrong, I love some of theese, I've even added a few to my favorites list, and I don't think that will change
Bu collarme has so many good looking women, if yoru reading this, and your one of them, Listen, your still gogin to be a knockout even without showing all your skin.
Submissive or no, if you show the Doms everything now, they have less to look forward to later right?
Plus, I've met some attractive women, but nomatter howgreat they looked, sometimes thier personalities don't measure up, and I've regretted not knowing more about them and basing a lot on appearances
So I geuss if youve "got it, flaunt it", but if you just take 1/10th of the efort you spend on a great pic making a great profile, I think your a lot more likely to find the guy/dom/sub/girl/trans/switch of your dreams :)
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ever had a day, wekk, month where nothing bad has happened...nothing really good either. life is just.....cruising by?
....but your pretty sure that means "something" is coming up around the corner, and your not sure, but you don't think your going to like it?
Or maybe I just think too much
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I've long been aware of the number of girls on the site that are only interested in other girls, there do seem to be a dispropotionately large number of them, but to each thier own
But what I'm seeing in jounral entries is that apparently a large number men are apparently impersonating women for an opportunity to connect with theese "girls only" women
Now number one, what would a guy possibly have to gain from this masquerade? They can't be hoping for any type of elationship, wether it's in person or on webcam I'm sure the lady is going to notice either the bulge in your shorts or your 5 o clock shadow
Number two I can assume that theese guys hit up theese women for nude pics or something else provacative....and it's a wonder theese guys are found out?
Here's a little secret I found out, women might really like someone else's hot bod, thier heart may pound, they might drool with lust, but it really isn't that big a deal to them at least compared to guys
Think about it, how many "Playgirl" type magazines are there? 4? 5? how many magazines are there with nude women? Stop counting when you get to the triple digits and I think you get my point. Bottom line I think very few women hit up other girls for sexy pics in the first couple of emails
So why do it? I can only assume again that theese guys are either so dense or awkward that they are frustrated with thier "slim" chances to connect with a straight girl. So they take it out on the women with whom they have "no" chance
and thus probably reminding lesbians why they're not missing out on much *sigh*
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wow, almost two years since my last journal hmmm.
I geuss the current rant is the list of "friends" I see on others profiles. Some have dozens and dozens of other users on thier friends list and have to be skeptical, Many seem to just want to "collect" profiles to show off, or simply say "look at all the pepole who like me!"
Personaly, and I know a lot of folk will think I'm taking this just a bit too literaly, I think a friend, even online, should be somone you exchanged more than just a half a dozen emails with. And probably fit into two fields
a.) Someone your really interested in as a possible Dom/sub
b.) Or someone you honestly consider a friend, and by friend I mean someon who would want to talk to you for an hour about thier cat that just died without any innuendo involved at all
Call me old fahioned....
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tried crab legs for the first time last night
;awful lot of work for so little meat (hmm sounds like some online expieriences) but it tasted ok
Only thing is you see a crab leg and you can see "hey that's some critter's arm!" hand/claw still attached
Hey I like eating meat, but I don't eat a steak and ponder what part of the cow it was carved off from
...and don't even get me started on crawfish. I have a rule when I will not eat food where the food is looking back at you |
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hey found a new word(s) to hate!
"home grown"
let the teeth gnashing begin.... |
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I've now been asked by two men in the past month or two who want me to have sex with their (in both cases) attractive wives
Now on one hand I'm kind of flattered, on the other hand a little freaked that someone wants to hop into bed with me in under 24 hours
...now so many of those sub profiles annoyed at "pushy" emails makes a lot more sense |
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thinking of shaving the beard/moustache...any opinions on the subject?
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A friend pointed out to me that today marks two years I've been on collarme
TWO YEARS.....730 days of looking
wow I don't know wether to celebrate or be depressed ;) |
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Update: successfully made over 4 dozen cookies that turned out fantastic and no disasters.....
...other than dropping three eggs on the floor |
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I am seriously looking at girls who "can relocate"
While this wouldn't be for awhile, my house will be fairly large at least from a single bachelor standpoint. So in taking time to meet with a girl, travel a few times ect;...well wouldn't hurt to have a few options now would it? |
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Just when I thought I was ok I get hit in the emotional breadbasket again
my ex gf from three years ago (though she was living here up until 18 months ago, five year relationship) is trying to make it clear that she dosen't really even want to talk or see me anymore. I know the reaction might be "well, Duh, Archer" But even after the breakup for the longest tme she was my best friend, and not sure how to react to somoeone not wanting to be your friend anymore. Isn't friendhip breakup's supposed to occur over fights? or just drifting apart?
ah well, just needing to vent again, oh geuss I should put something here that has to do with bdsm. Well, one of the key reasons we broke up (but not the only one) was my intrest in the lifestyle |
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Hey all
*whew* looking over my last journal entry and my message board post, can't beliee I was that down
I'm not depressed right now, just not doing cartwheels wither, just feeling a bit apathethic. SO my question to you all now is "how do you keep from being discouraged"
Not depressed, disouraged,depression you can at least cheer up from, but how do you rekindle intrest?
I remeber coming home on my lunch breaks just to check collarme mail and spending hours on the phone talking to "possibles". No worries have no plans to "quit" bdsm, I just miss that "spark" you know the idea of hoping something cool was waiting in the wings |
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You know in those romantic movies how the lovers tell each other "you complete me?"
thought it was just flowery storytelling
unfortunately I've now discovered what it means, and it wasn't by being completed
like buying a jigsaw puzzle that didn''t pass quality control |
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holy crap
3:00pm gave some catnip to the cat
3:15pm called my insurance agent |
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Just thought that since I got so much mail on that cat that was wandering around my apartment, thought I would give anupdate
Yes I've adopted the furball (or is it the other way around?)? Just don't tell my landlords
I'd tell you the cats name but hmm, Do I really want to advertize the goofy names I come up with for critters? |
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well now I'm 30, yay (can you sense the sarcasm?
question now is do more doors cose as a reult of girls looking for someone under 30? or do more doors open from girls looking for someone over 30?
....time will tell....
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I met a girl who really made me feel special
we've been talking on yahoo and webcam for the past week, and every night she was someoen who I looked forward to talking to, wether it was bdsm or just what happened during the day, we'd talk for hours
I always tried to be the nice guy I claimed to be, even to the point of frustrating her, and slowly let more and more of my Dom side show
on Saturday we decided to meet, we had a nice vanilla-style get-together, breaking my "mini-golf curse" (long story) and had a nice dinner and a movie. then we started to play
as near as I can tell the "play" itself was fine, maybe at times I was too rough, and others, not rough enough. It's hard to be cruel to someone you care about
In any caseshe started having feelings she wasn't expecting, and apparenttly not altogether pleasant ones. And asked me to leave, though it was very late. I unserstood, but really hoped this wasn't "goodbye" and we'd talk again
today I find that she's been on, but hasn't said a word, I see the blog she was beginning to write of our expieriences has been taken down. Maybe I'm reading too much into this, and I'm keeping my fingers crossed until I hear it from her, but don't think I have to be a genius here.
So why am I writing this? I don't know, I could say I feel heartbroken, but is that possible after only little more than a week? And I can't think of any friends I can talk to about this, that undertsand both the vanilla and bdsm sides of the equation.
Maybe I just have to put into words somewhere that I miss her, and really hope she comes back
Heather I miss you |
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something different happend to today
someone gave me thier number with a note saying I was cute and should give them a call
would be more thrilled if it wasn't from a "jason" |
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there's a cat in my apartment and I have no idea why
there is a yellow-colored cat that hangs around my aprtment, though it seems like a house-cat no one seems to own him/her, I sometimes buy little cans of cat food for him and aparerntly other apartment owners do also
while very friendly the bloody thing dosen't shut up (meows constantly) and he also seems to think he lives in my apartment (probably because thats where the food comes from)
right now I let him, and he's lounging under my dining table after a "marathon meow session" he's not staying, when I got to bed within the next two hours I'll put him back out (why? well no klitter box in my aprtment for one)
don't know why I'm putting this on a bdsm board, I was planning on talking about a book I found at barnes & noble "to serve and submit"...but maybe tomorrow....I have a distraction |
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I'm baaaaaa-ack!!
anyone miss me? |
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Hey just attended my first AHS meeting in almost 10 years (Alternative Hedonistic Source) and really had a blast! just wanted to thank everyone who actualy took the time to make me feel really welcome
John, Amber, Kathy, Damion, Audrey, David, Cubby and Annette....(waitaminute.....)
there are others too almost too many to list, but thanks to you all you guys rock! |
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I'm not dead!!!
just do a remarkable impression if I do say so myself, seriouslyglad to be back, and hope more than just one of you noticed ;) |
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I was once asked if I own any fetish wear....
now latex, leather, pleather, corsets, panties, halter tops, boostiers,torqs, chokers, garters, stockings, thigh-high boots, heels, zippers, buckles, d-rings, bracelets,anklets, belly chains, maid cotumes, hoods and caps....might looks good on a sub, or even a Domme....but can't se myself wearing nothing but a pair of leather chaps and a vest
anyone have any thoughts? or am I the one thinking too hard? |
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anyone got a good recipe for pork ribs? yes the man that always has cookie cooking culinary catastrophes is upgrading to something a little more porcine (hey got ribs instead of steak)
so gotten some help already, but hey! always willing for more help :) |
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want a rush? try waiting for a suprise visit from your Mom while you have a ballgag sitting on your desk....then let the race begin! |
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I kid you not
pepsi + my modem = no "net" for four days
yes this makes me a klutz, but I perfer to call it "clumsily charming"
on the bright side made 5 dozen chocalte chip cookies in the interim without any major property damage taking place :) |
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ran into my ex on christmas eve....
well not exactly "ran into" I found somethign she wanted at half price, and we had decided to stay friends, so a "nice" christmas present didn't seem out of line
Only thing is she took off her work smock....hickey...and her current boyfriend's picture around her neck
It's not that I wanted her to be miserable, far from it, But it's kind of a kick between the legs that sh''es not only doing ok, but she's found a replacement for you
Her new guy seems ok, looks kind of dippy (which isn't meant to be mean, but it hurts a little more when it looks like se traded down at least a bit)
But I geuss the big thing is he dosen't want to spank her. Didn't I mention? a major reason we broke up was she couldn't deal with the whole bdsm thing that seemed such an "important part of my life"
**sigh** the things i do for this lifestyle
Merry Christmas all wether you celebrate it or not |
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chiefs lost, damn I'm depressed, anyone want to cheer me up"
slapstick, dirty limericks, and even the odd knock knock joke welcome
please no clowns, I'm down enough already |
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here's an interesting idea
how would you rate the "qaulity" of the guys & gals you meet here?1 = nothing but pervs, 5 = nice guys but I wouldn't want to see them naked, or 10= found my Dom/sub in the first week! thanks collarme |
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Left my aprtment for some food, But what do I hear from across the hallway? grunts, groans and heavy breathing.
I freeze, not sure what to do, believe it or not I automaticaly feel like a peeping Tom, and didn't want to be caught.
Sorry no "Penthouse Forum" ending here, I just tiptoed to my Car, but I am curious about what other may have done in a similar situation, as this was a first for me |
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addition to below:
been perusing profiles for about an hour now, and getting very frustrated. Every so often will se an attractive girl, similar bdsm intrests...but how do you open a conversation when thats all I see?
withnothing to go one writing something like "so....it looks like you enjoy spankings"
seems like a one way street to being deleted and blocked. I'm not referring to hope for similar bdsm intrests. even hearing a gilr is a fan of "competitive basket-weaving" still gives me a way to say hello without seeming like a total perv....*sigh*...I'm going to go bake some cookies (again) |
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I've said it before, but this bears repeating....
Some profiles are very sparse....some folks don't even write anything at all hoping that "a/s/l" is enough to "find" who they're looking for
but I've seen some very well crafter profiles, some make me think,others are just damn cute. But even then only a very small percentage actualy put thier non-bdsm intrests in thier profile
Now it dosne't matter if it's "long walks on the beach" or "horseback riding" or a rousing game of "quarters" but uless either
a.) your hoping your future relationship will be nothing except constant bdsm or...
b.) your hoping for just a one night stand
this is pretty important information!
a girl can be just about perfect, but even if she has a fantastic body, and our bdsm intrests are exactly the same.....if she has an obsession about Pauly Shore movies, ther's going to be friction
food for thought |
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bake cookie BARS for 30 minutes, bake COOKIES for only about 10...once that cleared up my next batch went much better |
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crap, just burned my cookies!
the package says 350 degrees for 30 minutes, I cooked at 350 degrees for thirty minutes...where did I go wrong?
*sigh* |
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just wanted to take a moment and thank those who responded to me being stood up last week, it actualy means a folks, and wanted you to know I appreciate it.
incidentialy I've gotten more mail in this regard in the past week than I have in the last six months, maybe I should get stood up more often?....nahh |
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been thinking mysbe my lack of luck may be due to my nick "archer6" dosen't really sing does it? or at least it dosen't seem to stand out among the other Doms about
So I did a search for male Dominantnt, and on the first two pages I found at least 30 with "Lord" "master" or "Dom" in it
didn't know advertizing helped, I thought the last one was kind of obvious and the other two a bit presumptious
think I'll Stick with Archer6....for no other reason than "LordArcher" just sounds....off |
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damn, I don't date much...blame it on being in KC, or being a "nice guy". But to look as hot as I do right now and to be stood up on a first date? ARRGHH
just hate seeing me go to waste ;) |
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OK, about time for a "serious" journal entry. after all it's 3am in the midwest and not a whole lot of local folks on, what better tie for a muse to strike
if you notice I haven't checked any "intrests" on my profile. Why? because I think many folks don't seem to undersatnd the difference between "curious" "interested" and "turnons"
for one, I am highly skeptical of those that check every single option under intrests. Sure there are a few out there where little in the way of bdsm is taboo, and if that's the case, have fun. More likely though I think those folks are just trying to prove how "wild" they are...still nothing too wrong there, but I can imagine an awkward encounter where a girl who is only "anal curious" has to tell her perspecive DOm who is "seriously turned on by anal" that she's changed her mind
so my best definition of an "intrest'? somrthing that you have expieirenced and want more of, if your curious about something, or just "interested in learning more" well that would make an excellent filler for your profile
I'll go one better: "can relocate"
now a lot of "intrests" even if you have tried them and loved them can vary greatly, "verbal humiliation" can mean anything from "naughty girl" "filthy slut" or even harsher words wich can ake a girl cry...all are forms of verbal humiliation, but the "level" of hich is going to cary from person to person, and like I said makes excellent feul for bios
(and yes I know a lot of quotation marks)
"can relocate" is a whole new can of wormsthough
I kid you not, heard from one giel who moved cross country to meet/live with a Dom she met here, only to realize that the Dom lived in his Mother's basement
now from what I understand, there was no "lie" about his expierience, or what her life would be like living there....but having mom upstairs is just info a girl should know!
so "verbal humilitaion" and the like can be talked about and explored, and heck even if you are "curious" and change your mind later, thats what safewords are for.
but if you advertizing that you can move to be with an owner/sub there are some things you might want to consider?
how far can you move? some may only want to move in the same city, or even state, it usually depends on how attached the person is to family, friends and thier career
is it for a 24/7 relationship? you might automaticaly assume yes, but make sure the Dom in question can support you both if one or both of you don't plan on a "24/7 girl" working 9 to 5
if she won't/isn't working what will she do during the day? will you keep her in a box? or chained to the bed? (hopefully with some bathroom considerations made) some girls admit they ren't "domestic" so if she's not doing the laundry is she just going to be on the couch eating bon bons?
is she under "house arrest"? the poor girl I mentioned above wasn't allowe dout, partly of fear that "mom" would find out, and also with no car and the dominants limited income there was no where for her TO go.
what about appearances? are you ever going to have friends or family over? my folks just kind of roll thier eyes at my bdsm intrest, but other pepoles relatives might be a bit harsher in voicing thier opinions
will you keep up a fascade? like girlfriend? roomate? spouse? while that could work (just make sure the cuffs are out of sight, and the playroom door locked) it could hurt a girls ego to know she has to be hidden, many girls are proud of being owned, and like to hope thier Dominants feel the same way "hiding" dosen't show pride
whew bit of a long rant there, please rember that is is "only" ranting, I'm not trying to judge folks, but hopefully just make folks think, and maybe let folks know more abuot me, as always comments are welcome
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I don't believe it
I'm actualy getting sick of Dr.pepper...two 12 packs seems like a good idea at the time
should try this weird new age thing pepoel are tyring...involves yanking things of trees and squeezing them till juice comes out...radical concept I know
(ok for such a vanilla journal entry I probably should add something juvinile about "squeezing" and "huices"...but not tonight, beside I have a reputation to uphold) |
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Happy birthday to me :)
hey being a Dom, does this mean I get to give someone else birthday spankings? |
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Ok what do I go with this time?
How about first meetings? I've onlly ahd a few here and I think there are some basic rules, some thta aren't so basic, and some that just might make you smile
Ok fist wether your looking just for some weekend fun, or a Long Term relationship, I highly recommend a vanilla meeting first, commonly known in the vanilla world as a "date" A movie, dinner HOPEFULLY before meeting, you may have discovered some common non-bdsm intrests
Now this isn't so much a get-to-know--you plan. To be frank if your not looking for a LTR and just someon to spank/be spanked by, it probably won't matter if you can't remeber each other's favorite color, or that you cried at the end of Titanic
But thee important thing is to get a "feel" for the person involved does this sub seem like the type who will submit? or wil she be topping from the bottom, will this Dom respect safewords or are you going to be in fear for your life? granted a vanilla date or two won't give you a 100% way of finding theese things out, but hopefully there will be some clues discovered during the course of the evening
But what about the actual meeting? well first dress to impress the real you is gogin to be the first "real" impression the other person gets of you, no matter how many pics you have on your profile. But two word of advicedon't spend more time getting ready than you would say, getting ready for work. If you have to hit the manicurist, hair stylist, laser-hair removal specialist, buy a new set of clothes and vist the tanning salon, well I'm sure the other perosn will appreciate it, but unless thats a regular thing you do, it's going to be expected reguarly, and HEY! you might not even hit it off, get stood up ect and you'll just be lamenting all the extra cash you spent to look good for him/her
oh and just a side note, just because you don't look like you just got off from a modeling shoot, don't show up with more flesh exposed than hooters girl, or wearing something that will virtualy have to be peeled off, if the intent of the date is get to know each other you don't want to "tease" each other into doing something you might regret later
Then how about the actual meeting? ok, this might be an "old" trick, but once you safely "arrive" make a phonecall to someone you know, friend, roomate, whoever, you don't have leave a message or anythig, if yu show up on someone's caller ID somewhere, you at least have a record of where you were SOMEWHERE, if you change locations, wether by design, or "spur of the moment" repeat the process, so if you "wind up" at his/her place, excuse yourself while you use the bathroom, or heck hit the autodial on your celphone
Now this might be assuming the worse case "ax murderer" scenario but it dosen't have to be so bleak, what if you only took one car and your at a place in some strange part of town you don't know how to get back from? or maybe you need to make a "discreet" exit, but your friend dropped you off at the resturant? in short , know your surroundings!
ahh but this assumes thing may have gone on beyond the "planned" vanilla-ness of the first meeting, I'll get back to that in a moment
but during your meeting, mix up the conversation a bit for one discreetly bring up bdsm every now and again, it's why your meeting right? and it dosen't have to be lewd, and for heaven's sake don't be talking about bodily fluids/functions while your eating at applebee's! you can communicate thoughts without usinf more than vague words, your bright folks, I'm sure you can mangeBut just mention it from time to time, trust me even at a vanilla meeting, make sure that the other guy/gal isn't looking for a vanill arealationship under the pretense of bdsm, talk about ALL your intrests so while you may like skydiving macrame and yodelling....or yodeling while you macrame during skydiving, remember you have another intrest too
ok Now lets say your knees got weak upon seeing each other you couldn't help yourselves and ou wind up at thier place, or some hotel room.
number one! condoms! now just because your date dosen't have a "most wanted" poster at the center for disease control (and to be frank would you know if they did?) thier are all sorts of things a perons can be carrying in thier bodys from the embarrassing to the deadly.
I know I know, "bdsm dosen't necessarily mean sex". True. But if you couldn't contol your hormones to keep the first meet vanilla, chances are you can't keep the bodily fluids from flowing either
actualy depending on your will power cthe lack of condoms might allow you to control the evening. Case in point, during one first meeting I didn't have any condoms on hand...because, well it was supposed to be an innocent first meeting, things got more involved, but because I DIDN'T have a pack of Trojans on hand I was able to keep the evening under control. then again, if I had, I could have used them as an excuse to "break the rule" and coninue on hmmm
well I suppose those are my main point,s and I'll probably come up with some others, but guys, one last thing: flowers
I don't care if it's for an LTR or a one night stand, girls like flowers, in my opinion, even if they hate foilage. Why?
Think about it, unless you garden you have to make a side trip to pick up some roses or something, taking at the very least a side trip hom on the way to work/to the meeting. Also consider a gal can take 150%-400% the time a guy needs to "get ready". so under normal circumsatnces a gal has already spent more time than you on your meeting before you to even...well, meet.
so flowers aren't just a gift (or a cookie bouqet, or whatever)they're a showing that your actualy putting more effort into the meeting than "showing up"
whew ok, sermon over, go have fun folks! |
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ok what to write this time around?
OK, this might show a bit of ego here, but lets discuss what pepole put in thier profiles.
Now heaven knows I'm not an expert at "profile writing" the responses don't come streming in by the truckfull, but for better or worse I think that has to do with what/where I am and not what I've written. Suffice to say I've seen a ot of profile in the last few months and come up with a few thoughts
first is the picture, now I know a lot of you moan and groan about HNG's (horny net geek's) begging for pics.
now first off a pic isn't a bad thing, besides the fact that pepole do want to see who they're talking to, it does also get you on the leftside "new users" clumn when you log in, and more exposure is a good thing
soe may be reluctant to post a pic because of fear of being recognized by family/friends/co-workers. good point.
but you first have to ask if they were able to "discover" you, what were they doing on the site in the first place? secondly a pic dosen't have to be of your face. One sub just has a very attactive pic of her lower face, another had a pic of herself....wearing a ronald reagan mask?
also the pic dosen't have to be of YOU have a dungeon/playroom? maybe a flogger clooection your proud of? heck that pic of a sunset during your trip to florida. it all says something about you, and having a pic of anything draws attention to you and your profile
oh and another thing SMILE, yeah I know my pic dosen't have much of a smile (what can I say?, any bigger a smile I start showing dimples) this is for both Dom/mes AND subs. a smile dosne't make you any ess dominant, in fact it's wen a Dom/me smiles that the sub should start being worried
next (and this is just peronal opinion here) don't use any "glamour shots" of graduation type photos. To be frank, while this may be you "looking you best" it's probably not going to be how you look during your first meeting with your future Dom/sub.
that's not so say your pic should be you as you just stumbled in from the night before at 4am after an evening of club hopping....but you BEFORE the night of club hopping would work.
lastly on pics, and this is more for the ladies the more sultry the pics you have? keep them in reserve. If you have a pic you think you look just fantastic in, that's great, but it shouldn't be the first one folks see. I see gals in bikini's and lingerie and just imagnie the kind of creeps that email responses. The "hotter" pics could be a reward of sorts to the guys who don't email screaming "bow before me" and actualy take the time to wite a decent email (and I say guys, but I'd lay money a few Domme's do the same too)
ok that's the "pic" side of profiles after this gets a pproved (and see if I get many flames) I'll do the "writing" side |
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wow I'm getting commliments on my journal entries? whoa very flattering :) but still might be nice to get comliments on the profile itself *wink*
well I geuss this "edition" has to do with dungeons or playrooms
at the end of this year if all goes to plan I should be upgrading my apartment to a house at the end of the year. And one thing I've planning since then is to create a dungeon when that happens.
yes yes I know I'm getting ahead of myself, worrying about a dungeon when I don't have a girl to put it in. But a year is along way from now and hopefully that won't be an issue until then, besides this gives me a chance to be creative ;)
And thats where we are now. Some folks mention they have dungeons in thier profiles, but apapraently as soon as they see that the messgae is from a Dom I get deleted (I suppose thats understandable, how many emails are requesting playroom advice?
so then my call goes out, after all as far as I'm aware there's no "Better homes & dungeons" magazine. Theese are the things I would like to know:
is your dungeon for perosal use only, or is designed with "parties" in mind?
how many piecies of furniture/equipment do you have? do they get equal use, or do some collect dust in the corner?
Any custom pieces of equipment you have? or ingeneous uses for what you have?
where is it located? a spare bedroom? the basement? a shed out back?
how much space do you have? is it enough? or do you keep wishing for more?
any help you folks can gic is appreciated, as well as any pics you may have, wether it's a dungeon you have, or one you've seen elsewhere on the net
thanks
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for the love of heaven guys, if a gals profile says "lesbian" or "no men" it means don't message them, sheesh your killin the reputation for our gender |
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you know, maybe this is/was a bit short sighted of me. but I think this bears mentining
There are a few gals (and I assume guys too, I'll take your word for it) that are...well for lack of a better term "should be on magazine covers"
yes you know the ladies I'm referring to, the ones where the firstthought is "that's not really her" or "those can't be real"
I can only imagine the mail theese gals have to go through some resopnses say over 160...in ONE DAY!
so I usuallygo on with my browsing, appreciating they're looks, but that's all, after all they usually live a few states away, and even if not they would never talk to me right?
I was suprised
I've written a few messags to gals to let them know I think they're attractive, not just "oh your so pretty" but what about them I do find attractive, eyes, hair ect;
and I discovered girls LIKE to be complimented. but only if it's honest "nice ass" is not normally considered a compliment "you have a very nice figure" is
so some of you are shaking your heads and going "well duh, Archer!"
but before that you may not realize how many of those "160 messages" are either of the "your pretty, nice ass" or may be very polite inquiries, but shadowed by the fact that it's ually a "pick up line" of some sort
and yes I know not everyone reads a profile from start to finish, but READ some of the profile theese gals have written they KNOW your going to spend the first few minutes gawking, and they usally take that opportunity to show they're more than just a pretty face in thier profiles
bottom line, it never hurts to let someone know they're attractive if it's done tactfully and honestly. Even if a girl is collared and living many states away it's nice to know you made someone smile.; and heck believe it or not some of theese gals even have a few non-bdsm things to say , so don't be afraid of a little conversation |
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hmm been another week, sure I can find a rant
well maybe not a rant, but a bit of confusion, how many "wrong" reasons are there to be involved in bdsm?
I've been thinking about this, and unfortunately I've hit upon a few
1.) low self esteem; not too suprising, a lot of submissives may get involved in the lifestyle because they think they deserve the pain/humiation ect; that comes with a being s submissive/slave but I don't think a girl should confuse a submissive nature or even low ego (sense of self) with "worthlessness"
that's obvious in a Master/slave relationship sure a slave can be treated lik garbage treated with little compassion or dignity, and honestly? if that's your thing and your two consenting adults, well merry Christmas, and have fun. But at least to me, a girl should ALWAYS feel like she's wanted, I mean submissives aren't a dime a dozen, and there should never be a time where either the Dom or slave feels this way, you two met, found you had common intrests, and founded enough trust to do....well, whatever is you two do, that's not something to be taken lightly, and maybe I'm in the wrong part of the world, but that dosen't happen everyday
remmeber that and respect it, and take a little pride in yourself becasue of it
now on the other hand...there are Dominants who get involved due to low self esteem. This almost scars me, but it's not too hard to imagine, your family, our job, the irs guy, lotta folks go through thier day being yeled at and being told what to do, and if this isn't your idea of a fun time you may get it in your head to take it out on someone
and between you and me? I would never want to hit a girl as hard as a bill collector
I won't lie, coming home from a long hard day, and having your sub/slave...the one person where they don't control you, but the other way around can be theraputic. But you should be thankful for thatand not treat the poor guy/gal as an emotional/physical punching bag
urg look like I started renting anyway with my bdsm Dr.Phil routine, better stop for now, but if your reading this, let me know what you think |
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well finally got vacation time yes!...
...now if only I can figure out what to do with it :\ |
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wow has it been almost a month?
ok just musing here on a day off waiting for friends to come online, or justsomeone to say hello to. But as I wait around, it looks like I'm not the only one who's here at all hours of the day.
Now I know we're not quite a community here at collarme in the traditional sense, I still try to offer condolences when someone has lost thier special someone, or try to perk someone up if I see a somewhat sad journal entry (amazing how many times thats backfired though, seems it catches folks so offguard that I'm not flirting or anything)
but still, I have a little dream that if I ever won the lottery on having a big reunoin for all the "regulars" here realistic? no, but who said all my fantasies have to be strictly sexual? ;)
of course there's then the difficulty of getting ahundred strangers to give you your address, but not too worried about such detais at this point ;)) |
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Been looking at...well I geuss you could say the "compietition" and a recurring teme I'm seeing is "financial Domination" I've been around for a while, andwhile the concept seems obvious it seems to be pretty prevelant here
Now I suppose I can see the allure, giving your body over to someone is much more risky and personal than risking your bank account, but suprised when that seems to be the main thing theese DOminant "sell themselves" on
once again I can imagine the control-like anything else in D/s to be a matter of extremes, so just about anyhtnig in moderation is ok, but total finacial control? kind of takes the suprise out of it when a guy suprises a gal with flowers, or she wears something new a nd pleasing to the bedroom
well to each thier own I suppose |
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actualy got a message from a sub saying that being a "niceguy Dom" isn't a bad thing :)
cool
at least there's hope |
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well it's been a fairly average week, getting back to work after vacation, not too many replies, it's been suggested on another site where I refer to myself as "niceguy dom in the midwest" that being a "nice guy" is something of a turn-off that subs looking for Dominants may not want a jerk, but they don't want "nice" either. And wether of not thats how I advertise as, thats the image I project true "nice" means I try NOT to be a jerk or pain, but I also dont think nice means softeasy honestly all I think it means is respctfu, something a few doms I've learned should relaize shouldn't be exlusive to submissives |
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*sigh* geuss I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up a short burst of messages then nothing, though I'm hoping this is really due to the fact that the midwest isn't really a bdsm "hotspot" in fact I'm interested in hearing from other midwesterners to see if I'm alone in this respect.
P.S. while I honestly and truely do find it flattering, let me reinterate that I am heterosexual, sorry guys |
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wow, beginning to see some responses already. I'd blush if it wasn't so un Dom-like
the question is , is this a compliementary about my pic, or was my profile too boring on it's own? hmmmm |
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OK,OK I get the hint, most folks just aren't interested in a profile without a pic, hopefully thats not the only think folks will look at but well, hope springs eternal |
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| Age: 43 |
| Stanton,
California |
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