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| Ideally, I would like to meet a kinky individual on CollarMe who I can eventually have a relationship with, and would like to get to know someone on a social level before trying to get into play. However, in a situation where that won't work, I'm open to meeting for play only if the chemistry is right.
On some level I view BDSM as a game more than a lifestyle in that I like to play, but I don't think it needs to be the primary focus of a relationship, and any potential partner would need to be someone I can enjoy hanging out in a purely non-sexual/non-BDSM context. However, it is an incredibly fun and intense game that can set sex on fire as well as bond and build trust more quickly than would be possible in a conventional relationship. The ultimate turn-on for me is control, both giving it and taking it. I find the details of how it's done don't matter as much as the fact that one person is completely giving themselves over to the other.
I started out fantasizing about kink only as a sub, but from spending time around submissive women I've grown to love the dominant role pretty much equally and feel that I can make things much hotter for a sub by understanding the kind of things that turn her on from subbing myself. Still, while I've had some experience, it's been with woman who were primarily "vanilla" and I've never been with a woman that completely embraced D/S so I look forward to making that kind of connection. It doesn't really matter to me if you're primarily interested in staying in one role as long as you're willing to mix it up on occasion just to keep things fresh.
I find that my interest in kink is an offshoot of my general outlook on life in that I am always willing to try things and look for adventure in life. I like to travel quite a bit, and find that the more active I am, the happier I become. Still though, ultimately I feel like happiness comes from surrounding yourself with good people who don't get caught up in their ego and genuinely have love for their fellow man.
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