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VixenRedhedDomme

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I'm feisty, smart, pretty and sassy. I'm a serious conservative so if you are not, I'm not for you. We'd have nothing to talk about and, while you are entitled to your views, I'm not interested in listening to you spout "libberish" to me. I do not suffer fools well although I don't mind making them suffer LOL.

On the Meyers-Briggs Personality Test, I am an INTP with a MENSA card so that should terrorize a lot of you and intrigue the rest, as the test hits close to the mark. You can read about me here: http://www.16personalities.com/intp-personality Mix that with the redhead DNA LOL

I travel so I'm not around much, but I'm a lot of fun when I do show up. I want to laugh and dance and dine and play and I'm real and I'm looking for real and dom, sub or switch all work for me as no relationship dynamic is ever the same. I'm a good-time Charlie but I can't date vanilla, it's not for me. Maybe you are--drop me a line and tell me why you're for me.

If you are a dom, that's fine, for the right person I have no problem subbing to you and domme-ing the rest of the world LOL but I'm a straight-up baby girl when I sub and I enjoy the daddy-dom baby-girl dynamic immensely. No one is 100% ANYTHING in my view and if you are the right one and like the baby-girl daddy-dom dynamic then we will talk. I don't switch inside the parameters of a relationship so if I want to submit to your authority I will always sub to you--and the reverse is also true. I started in the scene as a sub but jumped the fence to the domme side when I was 25 because the "doms" I was meeting weren't too good at running their own lives let alone being in charge of mine. Live and learn as they say.

We'll talk about it. In person. I show up every time. I don't have any children and I'm not interested in raising yours either. Don't send me a picture of your willy because I'm far more interested in what's between your ears. If your profile photo includes your willy, that tells me your whole identity is your pecker, you will just be boring, and a waste of my time. If it has a photo of you dressed in frilly women's clothes, you are also not what I'm looking for, nor am I interested in cuckolding.

"CIRCLE OF FRIENDS" REQUESTS DELETED UNREAD. DON'T SEND ME ONE.

A few road rules (and please pay attention to them as I'm not kidding):

1. I'm 6'1 or more in every pair of shoes I own and I love love love tall men. Extra points for 6'3 and up because I like to play rough and I'd hate to break you...LOL and if you are under 6'2 don't waste your time. Nothing personal, but I want what I want and it's in a 6'2 or larger package. If you are not 6'2 or taller, then I am NOT interested. I can't say it any more clearly and I'm NOT kidding. No matter how wonderful you may be, I want what I want and I am not kidding. You can be everything on my list but if you aren't 6'2 or taller, I will not be interested. THIS IS ABSOLUTELY NON-NEGOTIABLE!!!

2. I'm not interested in anyone under 48 years old or more than 55 years old. While it is somewhat fashionable to date younger men, I will not consider anyone under 50. Nothing personal but I'm not a babysitter and I'm not practicing medicine any more. If you are older than 55 you need to be in excellent health and if you're under 50 you're wasting your time. Caucasian only please.

3. If you smoke cigarettes, I'm not interested AT ALL. If you quit, I'll reconsider. If you are unemployed, a heavy drinker, lack manners including table manners, pass me by.

4. I hate tattoos. If you are inked up, I'm not for you. I have NO tats and NO piercings and I'm not getting any either. EVER.

5. I don't Yahoo. Why would anyone sit and TYPE when there's no such thing as long distance phone charges any more? It's an inefficient use of my time AND yours. Call me on the phone or let's have coffee when I'm in town. Intelligent conversation is my favorite pastime.

6. Be prepared to meet very soon. I'm not spending months emailing and getting to "know" you because most of the time I discover that the ones who DO show up to meet look NOTHING like their photos and their age has been greatly misrepresented. If there's no spark when we meet, it was again a colossal waste of our time, so if you aren't ready to meet in person, don't waste my time with emails. I dislike wasting my time as none of us know when our time is over. Put up, show up or shut up.

7. I am a respected professional in my vanilla life. I post my picture because I am not ashamed of who I am or what I like, and owning the company where I work means I have no boss to give me grief over my life choices. I'm hard-wired BDSM and I was born this way. BDSM isn't something I do, it's who I am. However, I am cognizant that not everyone has that freedom, so in public I am always in my crispy vanilla coating with the chewy domme center under wraps.

8. No means no. I do my best to be nice about it and say it gently, but if I tell you I'm not interested, that's the end of it. Sending me begging emails isn't going to help your case in any way, and arguing with me certainly isn't going to change my mind, but it WILL piss me off and I will take appropriate action. NO MEANS NO and I'm not kidding.

I travel for work. Chicago, New Orleans, Miami, St.Louis, Palm Beach are all on my roadmap as the Lincoln flies. Other than Chicago, I travel EAST of the Mississippi river and SOUTH of the Mason-Dixon line. If you are not in this area or visiting it frequently, it's unlikely I will cross your path unless you come to me or send your jet. I'm not afraid to fly but I refuse to fly commercially, ask me why in person. Drop me a line--I'll have coffee/cocktails/dinner/whatever with you and we'll see what happens. I show up. Every time. Life is to be lived and enjoyed and I want to go everywhere, meet everybody and do everything. Twice. I am spending my remaining years doing whatever the hell I want to do and having fun. This adventure called life has been the most amazing thing I could ever have imagined (and I can imagine a LOT) and I'm grasping every straw, eating every bite, drinking it down to the dregs and getting a refill if I can!

The man I seek:

"The man who is proudly certain of his own value, will want the highest type of woman he can find, the woman he admires, the strongest, the hardest to conquer - because only the possession of a heroine will give him the sense of an achievement, not the possession of a brainless slut". -Ayn Rand

Unfortunately when I answer through the mail program it crashes so I have to send though your profile. I doubt this site will be operational much longer since it's almost constantly malfunctioning. Email directly here:
AmandaTrebiano@aol.com

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12/1/2017 12:41:21 PM
Unfortunately when I answer through the mail program it crashes so I have to send though your profile.  I doubt this site will be operational much longer since it's almost constantly malfunctioning. Email directly here:
AmandaTrebiano@aol.com

9/21/2017 7:49:46 AM
Got a brand-new MRI that shows the tumors are essentially the same size but in a new and interesting development one of the tumors LIT up like a light bulb--enough so that the radiologist made special mention of it--and they never write one single word MORE than they have to, so it's interesting and relates to a tweak in the treatment. I've been determined to find a way to break the cancer's fibrin coating to expose the inside of the tumor to the immuno-juice and have not had much success until this MRI which may mean that I have finally come up with a way to do it.  DMSO and Vitamin C which used to be given IV to break down tumors since DMSO targets cancer cells anyway and drags anything mixed with it into the cancer cells too.  Vitamin C inside the cells blows them apart and with the DMSO dragging the C straight into the cells.  
I have been dissolving 5 grams of pure pharmaceutical-grade vitamin C into about a TBS of liquid and adding a tsp of  
pharmaceutical grade DMSO which targets cancer cells and drags anything you mix with it INTO the cell--plus Vitamin C is so chemically similar to sugar that the cancer cells grab it too and it kills them.  I started doing this about 5 days before the MRI and I think it is degrading the fibrin covering of the tumor which will allow the GcMAF and the DMSO/C blend to KILL it once and for all.  They are still progressing a tiny bit, so I HAVE to shut it down or eventually the tumor load will be more than I can shut down with the immunotherapy and it will kill me down the road. The other issue is that the radiologist gave me the BS that I have cancer in my lymph nodes, but I disagree with that.  They are just doing their job, but the cancer cells are big and tend to clog the nodes (eventually causing ascites build-up) but the tumors are certainly exfoliating and that's why the nodes are swollen--BUT if I had lymphomic cancer, ALL my nodes would be swollen and painful and NONE of them are.  My doctor agrees with me on this.  Anyway since the tumor appears to be under attack from the DMSO/C  I have upped it to 10 grams a day with the DMSO. I'm literally making this up as I go--all I do is research--but people have been telling me how smart I am for my whole life, I've never thought so--MENSA card notwithstanding, but if I am--NOW'S the time!!

8/23/2017 12:33:51 PM
Still hanging in there, 18 months post-diagnosis and 9 months past the date the moron oncologists swore up and down I'd die without chemo. Now the longest-known non-chemo survivor of a 100% fatal cancer.  I am certain that chemo would have killed me a year ago, so I'm doing just fine.  I have no cancer symptoms and have resolved my supply issues AND finished my book which is selling rather well on Amazon so I can't complain about anything right now.  Another MRI coming up in September to see what's up with these stubborn tumors--although this cancer doubles in size every six weeks, they haven't progressed (grown) in almost a year which I guess could qualify as a remission, but I want to get rid of these two pesky tumors and seal the deal.  There MUST be a surgeon out there that doesn't believe in chemo chemo chemo and I need to locate him or her, no matter where they are located in the world--have passport will travel!  Thanks to everyone who sent me their best wishes and prayers, I know prayers matter and I appreciate all of them!

6/14/2017 5:06:36 PM

What it means is that I have two golf ball + size tumors and some enlarged lymph nodes which means there's cancer in the nodes now as well. Also, a sigmoid colon that is thickened like that usually means cancer as well, but I don't think so in my case since it was the same in April 2016 when I was cancer-free right after surgery. This cancer doesn't invade other organs more than superficially or spread through the blood
as most do into other organs. It's the only weed-n-seed cancer there is and it kills you with explosive growth and mushrooming new tumors everywhere. That I have no new tumors and also that the ones I had starting last July and August are now gone is why I've still got a fighting chance. If it weren't for the GcMAF I'd have died in December
of last year. I'm 16 months post-diagnosis, the longest known non-chemo-ed survivor of this cancer EVER. Remind me to call Guiness--I want in that record book for SOMETHING!!  It's not as good as I had hoped, but not NEARLY as bad as I had feared.

Considering the gap in medication along with the 75% reduction in dosage to stretch out what I had left, it could have been FAR worse.  Hopefully I will get what I need on my trip as I am leaving Saturday.   It progressed a little bit, but this cancer doubles in size every 6 weeks, and in 12 weeks it should be a lot larger, but is not, so cutting down the dosage and stretching it out appears to have been effective enough to prevent the explosive growth it is so famous for doing as it's method of killing victims. The problem is not whether or not it will work--I KNOW it works or I would have died last December like they told me I would without chemo. The problem is getting it back here in a large enough quantity to seal the deal and save my life. I don't know if enough even exists to seal the deal, but I hope so or this was all for nothing.  It's a scary thought that I can come this close and still lose in the end...or get hit by a bus  LOL

4/29/2017 9:18:32 AM
Had to endure yet another visit to a dumbfuck oncologist screaming "CHEMO CHEMO CHEMO" at me and lying about how many cases of MY cancer he has cured.  I told him to produce ONE 2 year survivor of what I have and we'd talk.  He said he'd cured hundreds of my cancer, but was unable to explain how I am the longest-known non-chemo OR chemoed survivor.  I called him a lying cocksucker TO HIS FACE and left.  The look on his face was worth the trip--I guess no one ever slapped him with that much truth.  It's sad when I know more about my cancer than the damn doctor!
So far so good, but may have to go to Europe for more immuno-juice--but I'm still alive and still kicking and still pretty OK.

3/12/2017 6:37:50 PM
I need a surgeon to cut out the last two tumors--they may be dead already, but I can't take the risk that they are not.  If I can find a surgeon who will cut them out (I have great insurance too!) I will survive the 100% fatal cancer.  If I don't, then I will die.  I can't find one that will cut them out without insisting I do chemo first to "shrink the tumors" which are the size of fucking walnuts.  They pay 5 grand for the poison "chemo cocktail" and bill you 75,000-100,000 and this is legal. That's why it's a 40 year old protocol with a 2.1% cure rate--and you get metachronous cancer 5 years later if you happen to live--and then--that's right: MORE chemo. 
I have seen 6 gyno-oncos all of which tried to force me to do chemo with the "shrink the tumor" bullshit with NO explanation why and when I point out that they took out my uterus which was 10 times bigger than both tumors combined and a 22 pound benign tumor out of my friend Mary Jane and no one said a word about shrinking THAT tumor and ask them what their chemo markup is, they throw me out of their office.  I'm NOT having chemo--even if I will die without it because they have a ZERO PERCENT cure rate with chemo.  I was supposed to die in November.  I'm not even sick--and I don't have so much  as a swollen lymph node. If you saw me you'd never think I had cancer--if I didn't know I had cancer, I wouldn't know either.  They want to poison me for profit and I'm not going to let them do it.
If anyone knows a surgeon (colo-rectal or general abdominal/thoracic) I have excellent insurance and can toss a nice cash sweetener on top of what the insurance pays.  

3/10/2017 12:05:33 PM

The results are not what we had hoped.

Good News: No new tumors and the smaller ones are gone definitely.Bad News: The two big tumors are stubbornly hanging on and I have too much cancer to kill. I am probably going to have to let them  chemo me and use the immunojuice to wipe out the rest when the tumor load is gone and hope my body can take the damage.

Worse News: Big Pharma shut down the immunojuice people so what I have is all I am going to have and it's not enough to keep treading water--because it will come roaring back and kill me. I do NOT want to do chemo but I'm not in any condition to keep fighting them and I cannot find a surgeon to take them out unless I agree to be chemo-ed. If anyone happens to know a surgeon, my insurance will pay decently to slice them out. I'm going to talk to my doctor and see if we can go to a bowel surgeon--that might be a way around it. I also have a plan B which would entail going to an ER screaming in pain and when they CT scanned me they'd see the tumors--but without my medical history which I have never allowed to be on the access programs--they will most likely open me up to take out what they see and send me for chemo which would

not happen. I think if I could get the tumor load down, I could kill it off, but the bastards are not going to remove them without chemo. I guess I could tell them I don't have any insurance LOLI don't know. This could be the end unless I want to do the chemo and roll the dice. I'm super healthy right now--other than this pesky cancer.


2/9/2017 6:39:57 PM

Even though I am getting very thin, it’s not from the cancer, it’s from the extremely low-carb diet I must remain on as sugar feeds cancer as we all know. I’m down to wearing size 6 jeans but I should be OK if I get the cancer cured. It’s been a year since I started down this road with the “preventative” surgery that wasn’t preventing ANYTHING.
Saw Dr. J today and spent about an hour with her. I was thoroughly poked, felt, prodded, manipulated, palpated and other assorted medical indignities for the better part of that time. She had the most interesting look of amazed wonder--like a kid who asked for a pony; and GOT one--on her face when she finished and she said she is starting to believe that I might just pull this off. I continue to be totally symptom-free and so far, so good! She's ordering another MRI so we will know more in about 3 weeks when I get the results. I continue to feel fine with no pain, bloating or any kind of cancer symptom. I'm WAY over an IV injection every day, but it's what I have to do to survive, so that's what I'm doing. My loathing for salmon has not decreased one iota, but I'm still choking it down 5 times (or more) a week and following the protocol as closely as possible. No matter how much my back hurts, no matter how much I hate salmon, no matter how tired I am of being stuck with a needle in my vein on a daily basis—this STILL cannot possibly be as bad as the nightmare horrors of chemotherapy. Nothing is as bad as chemo, plus this actually works and cures cancer and a lot of other things in addition to cancer. It’s nothing less than a medical revolution that leads to actual CURES for so many profitable chronic illnesses.


1/10/2017 1:30:33 PM
Still doing fine and all is well.  Next MRI Feb 2017

12/2/2016 11:07:47 AM

The largest tumor has NOT grown at all and appears to be more solid, but the smaller tumor HAS SHRUNK BY almost ¾ of a centimeter!! There's no mention of the small scattered milliary tumors so I am assuming they are gone. The bigger one has not increased in size and the smaller one is .7 cm smaller—and this cancer doesn't GET smaller so.…the only possible conclusion is that the GcMAF is working—it HAS to be or I’d be dead by now. While I am not out of the woods by a long shot, I've found the breadcrumb trail and hopefully it leads me to a cure. I have hope where before I had none. I go into the house and sit at the kitchen counter and read the report again looking over every word and I am still crying now—but it’s relief and joy. I had been steeling myself for enormous tumors that would mean my death in February or maybe March—as the oncologists had told me would happen—but the GcMAF is working!! IT’S WORKING!!!


9/26/2016 6:21:25 PM
As luck would have it, Dr. S planned to chemo me too.  He's going to need another plan because it is NOT going to happen.  He gave me the same bullshit about how he had to shrink the tumors but I know that's bullshit.  Thank GOD I had my surviving sister with me who got me TFO of there!!
I am writing a book about BRCA1 and HGSC. I have done extensive research--and have written nearly 200 pages (so far) of sourced  information about it. I've studied HGSC 5-8 hours a day 6-7 days a week since February 19, 2016 and have read over 1000 clinical studies of HGSC and over 100 studies of the efficacy of platinum-based chemo on HGSC and ALL of them died with the progression-free survival (PFS) averaging less than a year. None lived more than 22 months after initial diagnosis at stage III-IV.  I never worked in oncology and this is one of only two cancers I have studied, but I know a LOT about it--and way more than 5 of the 6 oncologists I have seen. I have been to 17 physicians and 6 oncologists. Each and every one of non-oncologists has told me that IV chemotherapy cannot and will not help me, but every oncologist has tried to force me to have it with two of them asking me to leave their office when I asked them what was their markup on the resale of the chemo drugs that they buy for 5K and all of them giving me the "shrink first" lies.
Additionally, I have read over 100 studies that tell me that IV chemotherapy cannot help me. It is not because I am some big holistic medicine fan that I am refusing chemo. I am not. I am a firm believer in better living through pharmaceuticals and always have been. I personally believe that holistic medicine is bullshit.  However chemo does nothing for me except make me suffer, puts $50-$100,000 for each resale of the chemo cocktail drugs in the doc's pocket, and I still die in January-ish 2017.  I'm not interested in "time" for the sake of time--I am interested in a CURE which will ONLY come through immunotherapy.  There are European immunotherapy trials as well and I can afford to go there and will seek an immunotherapy trial overseas.  
I went back and re-read the parameters of the immunotherapy trial. They clearly state that I cannot participate in the trial if my current tumors have been treated with chemotherapy.  I can see no medical reason to chemo them before removal, reaping the profit on the markup of the chemo drugs isn't a medical justification  Benign tumors weighing POUNDS are removed without "shrinking them" which I am sure is due to the fact that people without cancer can't be terrorized into allowing themselves to be voluntarily poisoned.  The FDA may have been bribed into approving any drug that shrinks a tumor for 28 days an effective cancer treatment, but you and I both know that doesn't mean JACK toward a cure.  I'm not
signing up for ANCIENT 39-year old chemotherapy.  Where's the TRILLION dollars of research money that joke of a charity ACS conned out of the public?  Why is an almost 40 year old treatment the BEST you've got?Especially since the survival rate is 2.1% overall and ZERO percent for HGSC?  There are NO KNOWN SURVIVORS of what I have.  NONE.  There are four kinds of ovarian cancer--three of them are survivable--but HGSC which is 74% of all OVCA cases (of which 38% are BRCA1/2+) is not survivable when there's a recurrence, and peritoneal carcinomatosis is "always fatal complication of ovarian and all other abdominal cancers" in which EVERY SINGLE PAPER AND STUDY I HAVE READ concurs that I am going to die and that IV chemo cannot help me.  We all die--it's just a question of the state of your health up to the end. 9 weeks is potentially the rest of my life and I'm not spending them bald, puking, sick and miserable with a totally demolished immune system WANTING to die--that's just not going to happen.  I want a cure, not a remission.  I want my LIFE at 100 mph with my hair on fire which is the way I've lived my entire life--not some miserable sick existence.  Nothing else is acceptable.  If I die, so be it--but I'm dying on MY terms, and the only platinum ANYTHING that is getting near me is shiny metal set with E-F VVS diamonds.
Needless to say, I won't be keeping my Thursday appointment for chemo.

9/6/2016 11:04:16 AM
I'll go to Florida on Sept 19th to see Dr. S with the Miami University cancer center immunotherapy trial and that's the one I WANT to get into and I WILL.  He's smart and he wants me in his trial BADLY because he and I have had a meeting of the minds--here's how bad he wants me in his trial:  8 minutes after I emailed him an inquiry about getting into his trial, HE CALLED ME ON THE PHONE at 6:30 am to talk to me.  SOP is the patient is sent on a records hunt and has to fill out a bunch of forms.  They CALLED ME and took all my information over the PHONE--unheard of--and they let me email them DIRECTLY with the pdfs of my records which is MORE than adequate for them to document I am a BRCA1+ and I do have peritoneal carcinomatosis and that my sister was the same and died from the same high-grade serous carcinoma I had. Also, they use my TUMORS to make the immuno-stuff so they will be removing them FOR FREE which that alone could buy me an extra few months of high quality life if it comes down to it.
The trial in Houston and Chicago told me I'd have to have chemo to qualify.  I got out in front of this by pointing out to Dr. S that because I have NOT been chemo-ed my immune system was fully operational which in theory AND REALISTICALLY gives his
trial a much better chance of success which could turn it into a FRONT-LINE medication/procedure rather than the last resort. The profit difference would be staggering--which I also pointed out to him.  Doctors are shitty businessmen, but a hard science gal like me with an understanding of how he can profit massively by saving my life to show him the way to Jesus and the promised land of great wealth.  I build BEAUTIFUL castles in the sky and people cannot wait to move into them.  Also, I don't know that the Euro-juice isn't working although the issues with getting it have caused a very stressful week.  It's out of my hands.

8/22/2016 6:41:56 PM
Dr. M is a first-rate money grubbing Big Pharma whore. With a definite diagnosed HGSC she still felt it would be necessary to do a biopsy and that I would have to have chemo as well and a PET scan that my insurance won’t pay for. I thanked her for her time and I got up and left. The problem is that the standard of care is chemo, surgery, more chemo and then death while the oncologist (and let us not forget the HUGE markup the get on the drugs they buy and RE-SELL to the patient at a huge markup) gets rich by poisoning me. No thanks Dr. M—but if you want to die, this is the doctor for you. Chemo is her thing and she didn’t even want to hear about the immunotherapy so she’s a bad doctor in addition to being a bad person. I don’t know if I am going to be able to get a doctor to remove these two tumors, she isn’t going to deviate from what she learned in medical school and is pushing the 39-year old chemo treatment with the 2.1% success rate and the $50,000.00 in her pocket for each unsuccessful treatment as she turns me from healthy and vibrant to bald, vomiting and dying. Fuck her and her cisplatin and carboplatin taxane flavored POISON.

8/15/2016 10:08:34 AM
The result are not what we had hoped for.
I expect to have surgery within the next 2 weeks and I am maintaining the immunotherapy dosing schedule. Interestingly, the smaller scattered tumors did not progress AT ALL and there are NO NEW ONES and my doctors are baffled that there aren't since the biggest tumor has been spraying cancer cells for five weeks.
This is considered to be the MOST aggressive cancer known--high-grade serous cell carcinoma.  There are NO known 3 year survivors of this kind of cancer so I have passed scared and I'm now terrified but I believe in GcMAF because the science is solid.  I am certain that chemotherapy will kill me and I would rather die
than let them pump me full of POISON!

8/9/2016 8:48:55 PM
Big MRI tomorrow. I am alternating between freaked out, batchit crazy and scared to death.  This
is not a game any more--I think it must be what waiting to be sentenced is like--in a death
penalty case. 
It's been a bad 10 days and tomorrow's MRI tells the story.  I'm a head case right now.

7/24/2016 9:09:47 PM
12 days on the immunotherapy program and I FEEL GREAT!!  I haven't felt this good in a year, I knew something was wrong but with my sister dying of cancer--the same cancer I now have: High-Grade Serous-cell carcinoma which naturally is the most aggressive most malignant and most deadly of all the female cancers. It has a survival rate of less than 2% so the prognosis is grim. I figure I've had it since last May or so extrapolating from the medical record--I have a hard science education and I'm retired medical. I'm doing an experimental therapy that has had an amazing success rate which is good because it's expensive as hell--but even the amount I will need at 75 grand is cheaper than ONE chemotherapy treatment at 100K and a full series is 650K which my insurance would pay but they won't give me a dime for this. Thanks Obama!  However, I have a lot of faith in immunotherapy and the people who helped me get this from Europe (yes--I'm now in a Dallas Buyer's Club scenario sort of) are confident that they will save my life.  I hope they are right--and if they pull this off, then it will be all the way--it will never come back.  I feel incredibly good, I am following the protocol to the letter and hoping for the best.  We'll see what happens.

7/15/2016 7:22:01 AM
Apparently I wasn't paying attention at the Doctor's office since I've been told by two other doctors that I am terminal. "Peritoneal Carcinomatosis" is not treatable and not survivable. They say 6 months to a year maybe. They are in for a big surprise. 

7/12/2016 7:51:00 PM
Unfortunately, the new from the MRI machine is bad.  I have a recurrence and my OFFICIAL new stage of cancer is now Stage 3-B which is 2 stops away from Stage 4 which is the Express train to Terminal-town.  This is the worst possible news and I am shocked at how aggressively this cancer has roared back.  I am hoping for the best but not foolish enough to fail to prepare for the worst.  I will still not entertain the idea of chemo but I am going to a clinical trial of an immunotherapy drug. Clearly this cancer came to kill me and my doctors are scared.  I'm focusing the full power of LEGENDARY redheaded rage on this cancer so y'all should feel sorry for IT because I'm REALLY fucking mad now.
Don't hesitate to drop me a line--you might have to wait a day or three for a reply but unless you said something really ignorant or send me a dick pic I'll get back to you.
That's the view from the sofa...

7/9/2016 9:37:11 PM
6 month MRI today, this is the scary part.  WITH or WITHOUT chemotherapy high grade serous cell carcinoma recurs in 6-18 months, so the next year will tell the story.  I have a date with the MRI machine every 90 days for the next year and if I get through to 18 months then statistically speaking my odds go way up. Results Tuesday-ish...

5/22/2016 5:48:28 PM
I am meeting with the surgeon back in Illinois on June 1 for more surgery.

3/27/2016 6:16:26 AM
John 11:25-26 Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. Believest thou this?
HAPPY EASTER!

3/21/2016 7:19:55 AM
The second surgeon staged my cancer at 2c which I disagree with, I put it at 2a but he wants to do big-gun nuclear weapons-grade platinum-based chemo for cancer that was surgically removed on 3/12/16 by my original surgeon and the second surgery revealed NO spread of the cancer.  Everything was clean except for the pelvic wash WHICH SAT ALMOST 19 HOURS before being examined showed a few "atypical" cells.  However, I just do NOT see the need for cisplatin chemo for less than 50 "atypical" NOT MALIGNANT cells.  Chemo is 50K a pop and 6 rounds of it is 1 treatment so we are talking THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS if I let them do the chemo. Now, granted, it's not my money; it's my insurance company's money--but I don't spend their money frivolously either as that makes rates go up for everyone.  I do not let them repeat tests for their convenience; I make them use the results of previous tests, but this isn't germane to the current issue.  The problem is that Big Pharma and the Cancer industry whom I like to refer to as "Cancer Inc." does NOT want a cure--and their cure rate of about 2% shows that.  Big Pharma can't let cancer be cured—they make SIXTY BILLION DOLLARS A YEAR on cancer treatments and drugs that would vanish in a puff of smoke if they let a cure happen. Since our UTTERLY CORRUPT government gave Big Pharma control of the FDA as a thank you for their bribes, the effective alternative treatments remain unapproved and people keep dying. Doctors are the handmaidens of big Pharma and I don't trust them, never have. Here's an analogy I use to demonstrate why cancer will never be cured if Big Pharma can help it:

Say I am a professional dragon-slayer (Big Pharma) and I go to kill the only dragon (cancer) in the kingdom. It's a lose-lose for both of us. If I kill the dragon, I'm unemployed if the dragon kills me I'm dead. However if I start a foundation to study HOW TO KILL DRAGONS (American Cancer Society) and sell supplies (chemo, radi, surgery)  to fight dragons; I can take in millions in donations and sales of supplies every year. Why on EARTH would I want that dragon (cancer) gone? It's killing the goose that keeps laying 60 BILLION DOLLARS worth of golden eggs every single year.  I am also NOT going to let another dragon-slayer (RSO oil) sell a product that will kill this dragon either and I will bribe the corrupt, greedy King (US Government) to keep it off the market which the King is delighted to do.
This chemo will damage my heart, brain, liver, kidneys.  It will cause irreparable painful neuropathy in my hands and feet and legs for the rest of my life.  It could damage my kidneys to the point of being dialyzed every 3 days for the rest of my life. FOR A FEW ATYPICAL CELLS? Are you fucking kidding me??


3/7/2016 4:34:21 AM
Second surgery went well. Surgeon said that he did not remove all the omentum which is a good sign, he wouldn't have left it if it had appeared to be cancerous.  The lab results will dictate the next step.  It's my understanding that this cancer is so very aggressive that even at Stage 1 there is chemotherapy.  I don't know that I see the point to chemo that is harmful to my body for a cancer that may be 100% surgically removable. This cancer has a very high recurrence rate and becomes chemo-resistant after the FIRST round of chemo.  I'd hate to be poisoning a cancer-free body and using my big gun weapon NOW instead of for recurrence that I have a 64% chance of having.  Please feel free to share your thoughts.

3/2/2016 5:35:05 AM
I am literally floored by the kindness of the strangers who have written the supportive emails I have been receiving.  I'm touched beyond words and I thank all of you for your prayers and for reaching out.
More surgery Thursday, March 3, 2016, and it all hinges on that really. If everything comes out clean I stay at stage 2a with an 88% survival rate, if not, I go to a stage 3a or worse and that drops me to an 19% survival rate.  I am understandably worried.  My sister died of this very same cancer 90 days ago--It's horrible to put my elderly parents through this again.

2/26/2016 8:21:12 PM
Surgery revealed Stage 2 or higher ovarian/uterine cancer, high-grade serous carcinoma. which killed my baby sister 90 days ago (on 11-18-15).  I am now in a fight for my life and there is more surgery coming on 3/3/16 where they will now remove more tissue (the omentum) and the pelvic lymph nodes to see if the last surgery (which was to PREVENT cancer as I am BRCA1+) got ALL the cancer that was unsuspected.  My mammogram this morning was clean thank GOD--I do NOT need to have to battle breast cancer as well. Thank you to all the well-wishers who sent supportive emails!!

2/14/2016 11:08:10 AM
Recovering from major surgery on 2/12/16, if you email, there may be a delay before you receive a response.

1/28/2016 7:21:49 AM
Nothing is funnier than reading the poorly written profiles of these "Masters" in their 50s and 60s who are looking for an "attractive, intelligent, professional, educated, employed 20-something with a great sense of humor to "use and abuse".  Then you see the photos of these "Masters" and they are 100 pounds overweight with a foot-long beard, rotting teeth and a WIFE (that is just as fat and ugly) who "isn't into the scene" but it's OK with her if he takes a slave for household chores and "hard use".  Let's dissect this and see how totally unrealistic of a fantasy it is.  No smart, funny, educated and attractive 20-something is going to come within a hundred miles of these pigs.  Why would she?  No woman who has ANYTHING going for her is going to be interested in a married man either.  The hysterically funny part is NOT that they are looking for a movie star-type that wouldn't wipe her Prada shoes on these morons, it's that these idiots actually COMPLAIN that there are no "good" subs or slaves on CS because THEY can't find one!!  Well DUH rocket scientist--look in the mirror and you will see why your profile gets no response.  I won't even go into how their profiles are filled with spelling and grammatical errors--which is a sure sign they aren't the "professionals" they claim to be.  I read one from a truck driver--no kidding--who was looking for a slave to ride around in his semi with him and serve him while living in the truck but had a wife who of course "isn't into BDSM" and was journaling and actually seemed surprised no on had responded--due of course to the dearth of REAL slaves here. What planet are these Bozos from?  LOL I mean really--are they kidding? If they aren't, then they don't have enough of a grasp of reality to be a Master because they actually think they're going to get a response from a photo of them in a beer-stained T-shirt that is 3 inches too short to cover their massive beer guts.  Really? Seriously?  ROFLMAO

12/25/2015 6:40:54 AM
 "And she will bring forth a Son, and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins."  --- Matthew 1:21 "For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord."    --  Luke 2:11 
Merry Christmas!

10/12/2015 2:19:21 PM
I have to laugh when I read profiles of "no limits "Masters" " and how they want to have all these slaves who will never be seen again.  Fake fantasy profiles are the easiest to spot because they are so totally unrealistic. If someone actually ANSWERED one of these idiot's ads, these pussy "masters" would run back to wifey in the 'burbs in abject terror.

5/26/2015 9:01:37 PM
Cross the North Korean border illegally you get 12 years hard labor.If you cross the Iranian border illegally you are detained indefinitely.If you cross the Afghan border illegally, you get shot.If you cross the Saudi Arabian border illegally you will be jailed.If you cross the Chinese border illegally you may never be heard from again.If you cross the Venezuelan border illegally you will be branded a spy and your fate will be sealed.If you cross the Mexican border illegally you will be jailed for two years.If you cross the Cuban border illegally you will be thrown into political prison to rot.If you cross the United States border illegally you get:1 - A job  2 - A driver's license  3 - A Social Security card  4 - Welfare  5 - Food stamps  6 - Credit cards  7 - Subsidized rent or a loan to buy a house  8 - Free education  9 - Free health care  10 - A lobbyist in Washington  11 - Billions of dollars in public documents printed in your language  12 - Millions of servicemen and women who are willing to – and do – die for your right to the ways and means of our constitution  13 - And the right to carry the flag of your country - the one you walked out on – while you call America racist and protest that you don't get enough respect.

IF YOU AGREE, COPY AND RE-POST THIS!

1/9/2014 6:08:37 PM


I've always been a good woman; I just enjoy doing some bad things.----TDN


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harshness99
 
 Age: 18
 Lexington, Kentucky