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I'm here because a friend gave me the link. that is usually how it happens, hm? So I'm obviously interested in the whole lifestyle, since I'm signing up...I haven't been in the lifestyle for long, probably a couple of months...be nice :)
I'm looking for a real man to be my Dom.....I like gay guys, but I don't find it very arousing to watch a guy get fucked in the ass..*shrug* so, no, I'm not looking for a male sissy maid, no I'm not looking for a guy who wants me to fuck him in the ass with a strap-on, I'm not looking for a guy who is into that.....I like my men manly...and yes, you can be a manly man and still be submissive ;)
I am a switch, so I am also actively seeking a Submissive Woman.
I am more submissive towards men, but if I find a Domme that is not all bitchy and snappy, then I'm good.
To those of you who don't really care to notice, I have alot of pictures up. Plenty. If you don't even have ONE picture, Chances are I will immediately click delete. I don't like Anonymous chatting...I like to know who I'm talking to. So if you actually pay attention to this, and you have no pictures up, put some up, otherwise you're wasting your time just to end up in my trash bin :):)
What I enjoy - the basic flogger and spanking and paddle....
I enjoy experimenting, but not too much to handle. I'm not interested in play with - children, my mother, animals, fire, needles, smothering, any kind of choking, electricity, scat, watersports, bloodplay and I will try to think of the rest soon..
I enjoy light bondage, the kind where you can move, yet are still tied up..I enjoy feeling comforable, and bondage to the point where you cannot move will not work unless you know the person THAT well. To those of you who are interested in the stuff I listed above as my no-no's, don't waste my time and try to convince me, because you won't. Do you know that feeling where you see someones profile and you feel like that person you just HAVE to meet? I have yet to get that feeling :P just felt like throwing in a little humor there. I will add some poetry to my journal each day, so please check it up regularly, it would be very much appreciated :)
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The Home of the Brave
Time is free
Love is blind
as far as I can see
Standing on the edge of nothing
nothing is...everything
What is peace and quiet
With war, murders and rapes among us?
Where did we begin
and When does it all end
When should we start living
When everywhere I look
people are dying?
Every other person is crying
try to make the best of
Domestic violence, suicide bombers
and shitty politicians
Let's all get along
but everyone around me is lying
fighting for power and laughing at the poor
Every man for himself
and I can't watch this anymore. |
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Well, pay is still the same and I screwed up the last mystery shop so apparently I'm off the register until further notice...the work they have me do while off the register is tedious and ridiculous....I wish I knew of a better job close to me...I really do.....and I don't want to drop this job, but considering how much I get paid.....I do NOT get paid enough to walk on eggshells and get treated like shit. |
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Been working at Blockbuster for some months, still a CSR and still trying to get my pay raised..........oh and I am waiting for someone to offer me dinner and order a delicious meal for me w/o me knowing what it is beforehand :P
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I wasn't able to get certified. I'm living with my mother for right now while working at Blockbuster parttime...seeking a roommate and a lover/deep relationship......I'm trying to stay sober...as an alcoholic, it's a trial but I'm keeping down that path. |
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I received my GED. I'm about 80% complete in CNA and I am on summer break until the 17th this month...I'm going back and am supposed to be finishing up my skills and studying and whatnot until the end of august which is when I am going to Clinicals and taking my State Test. |
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I'm in Job Corps, been there for slightly over 4 months; am about halfway done with CNA, am a mentor in training, am taking my GED test next week, and as soon as I'm done with that, I'm going to advanced training for LPN, then off to college to become an RN and/or a therapist.
I know, I have very high expectations for myself, but considering how good I've been doing so far..I cannot fail. I can only get better. I am doing great with my family. I am happy, and they are happy for me :)
My Aunt has a cancer that could kill her....I don 't know much beyond that but please pray for her, everyone. The people that hold the world together are the ones who have faith, and if it is God's will, she will do just fine. |
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I'm in Job Corps now...been there for almost 3 months...am on weekend pass. I am Morale Leader of the first floor of the only female dorm (there are 2 floors), on my way to becoming a mentor, and am in a gays/lesbians/bisexuals/transgendered group.....So far, so good :) |
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I'm going to Job Corps in Simpsonville tomorrow. wish me luck :)
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another new poem....
Touch
His hand caresses the back of my thigh
And I think of the things he shall do
But I dare not whimper or cry
The feelings are so intense, as he fondles me
And I squeezes my eyes shut tightly
The familiar scent that lingers
as he fondles me, ever so carefully
But as he does so, it seems so perfect
Am I dreaming? Is this really happening?
And as I whimper slightly, I feel his warm embrace
From behind me, he can tell that I'm overwhelmed
That the feelings are so overpowering
It doesn't seem real, it feels like a fantasy
But that is why it's so perfect
That's why it is so right
Can he do anything wrong,
At this very moment?
When will my heart start beating
Because this is so wonderous
It may seem like so much
But as I wake up,
I would do anything for your
Touch.
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New Poem, tell me what you think :)
The Wilting Flower
They always seem so blessed
To see a perfect rose
That stands up so tall
With a beautiful and wonderous pose
but they come back that winter,
to find that rose is drooping
And no longer is this plant
Like it was before, so soothing
What they don't realize
Such a wonderful thing about this flower
Is that very soon it will be back
With the old familiar power
So when they returned that spring
Apparently it was a shock to see
That the flower was back and beautiful as ever
And as I look in the mirror today,
I see now, that the flower is really me. |
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Realistic.
Let's be Realistic. Would you ever let a homeless person stay with you because your heart goes out to them? Let my lesson teach you alot.
I went to a job corps orientation several months ago. When I got there I found that one of the girls in the same orientation as me had no place to go. So I harassed my mom into letting her stay with us. This was in June. up until about a month ago or so, she was still here. Eating all our food, using my library card, treating me like crap even thouh I was the one who pushed to get her a decent place to stay. The girl was apparently a Schizonphrenic who had TONS of debt wherever she went....right now she has a library book she checked out in MY name that is rolling over and over with more dues and right now it's 25 bucks overdue. I don't know where the bitch is, because she's supposedly staying with an aunt or something...Why the bitch didn't go to stay there in the first place, I don't know.... (and why hasen't the cunt returned the damn book yet???)but i'm tired of changing my name around so I can get new library cards. I'm a huge bookworm, and there are only 2 books overdue on my account right now...one I accidentally left in my room...so it's about a 50$ amount due to the effin library! whatever happened to 25 cents per day past due?????
Don't ever do the good thing and let a stranger into your home. These people are nuts.
oh and I'm still waiting for Job Corps..-_- apparently it's normal to have to wait a lifetime for this fecking program. |
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I'm wondering if there would be a female from Louisville willing to play with another couple with me as her Domme/ temp domme...whatever...because I enjoy playing in groups and I would LOVE to dominate a female...I'm very caring, sensual, patient, and fun....I hope that I find a sexy sub girl soon :) |
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Imagine
His lips pull my bottom lip into his mouth
His hands holding me, his desire moments away
And maybe, just maybe....this will happen one day
As I slowly awaken, my dream starts to fade
My day continues on
breakfast, a shower, and putting my clothes on
But there's no chance of forgetting
this one dream that continues on
He slides his hands underneath my silky shirt
And as his fingers graze my skin
There's this sudden warmth from within
I want this man...I think abot him day and night
No matter how hard I try, I always have a desire to look into his eyes
As he kisses my neck, my lips, and my breasts
I suddenly wake up again, no longer will I rest
Insomnia grabs a hold of me
I can no longer sleep at all
Because if I go to sleep
He will not hear my call
So maybe one day, I will see this man I think of
Maybe if I look closer, to the kind and sparkly stars above. |
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still feeling pretty shitty...I finally get to go to the doctor on friday >.< which is gay because for the past several days I've had troubles breathing and *gasp* that takes away most of my smoking time...I know, pathetic huh? I still smoke, I just don't inhale as much....wow. lol how sad is that? anywho...I'm feeling shitty and nobody has brought me soup kleenex and flowers yet. what a lovely week this is........ |
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I'm home sick today...I'm surprised that I did well at the party last night, cuz I was feeling pretty shitty earlier in the week...I had to go tho...but anywho. I wish someone would bring me some damn flowers kleenex and soup....is that asking alot? didn't think so....the guys are just stupid |
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I went to my first real play party this evening....I did pretty damn good...there was mainly just flogging and spanking but what brought me to tears was a ruler....it hurt like HELL..but anywho, I'm doing very well in my experimentation to see what I really love...I had a very great experience tonight :D |
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I gave my first spanking last night, and recieved my first flogging weekend before last :)
I'm really getting the hang of this stuff....and some people in the books that I'm currently reading say that it should all be fantasy, but I think about being flogged and spanked and whatnot sooooo much every day.....it's now a part of my inner being....I crave to serve a worthy Dom/me and I also crave to Dominate a worthy Sub....It's so crazy how quickly I got into it.....and I feel like it's been a part of my life for years and years... |
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| Age: 20 |
| Los Angeles,
California |
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