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Jameswantstoserv's Journals

Journal Entries by Jameswantstoserv:
1/10/2017 3:43:30 PM
Falling down the rabbithole, not sure what is happening, what will happen or whether I even want to stop or fall further.  
I am going to a place I didn't want to go to, that isn't who I am, but I can't stop as I crave her attention, I yearn to please her. There are points I worry that I could go too far and then she tire of me and I would be lost and unable to go back. If I knew it was a certainty, if I knew it was happening soon it would be easier but I don't and I am scared, cautious but excited.Falling down the rabbithole, not sure what is happening, what will happen or whether I even wa

12/29/2016 7:54:38 AM
I don't know what I feel now. Was I wrong, did my thoughts offend, did you bore of me? I don't know what I feel now. Was I wrong, did my thoughts offend, did you

12/25/2016 5:12:25 PM
I am down the rabbithole, I feel scared, I feel excited. When every spare thought you have is for someone who doesn't want you, doesn't feel what you feel, unrequited feelings, looked on as a lesser person, yet you still can't take a breath without a thought of them, it is rough. When you are prepared to do something that makes you feel less of yourself, goes against everything you want, then you know where you are going to end up.  
I am down the rabbithole, I feel scared, I feel excited. When every spare thought you have is

12/22/2016 10:17:43 AM
She makes me want to do things I know I will abhor. I would bebase myself for her just to amuse her. I know what she aims me to be and I both don't and do want it.I am already doing thing I never wanted to do and it becomes routine. I know this journey will only become worse for me but I need her and as much as I feel like a failure as a man I don't know if I can exist without her.  
This is what two weeks with Mistress Rachel has done to me. I am a basket case of confusion, fear, joy and devotion.  
My name is now Sissy Jamie.  
Follow any progress I make and to speak to me please ask Mistress Rachel on CM at sissytask2  
She makes me want to do things I know I will abhor. I would bebase myself for her just to amus

12/20/2016 7:06:54 PM
That is you!  
I have no words.  
Instant reaction, breath taken away.  
Best Christmas present.That is you! I have no words. Instant reaction, breath taken away. Best

12/19/2016 7:11:21 PM
I think I am done, Mistress Rachel amazes me, she owns me, she doesn't want me but she wants me to be happy, to reach a potential that scares me and I keep coming back. I can't say what will happen, but if I lose her from my life I will be destroyed.  
As such, anyone who feels the need to message me, please ask Mistress Rachel her handle on here is sissytask2.  
I thank you for your adherence to this request.  
Sissy JamieI think I am done, Mistress Rachel amazes me, she owns me, she doesn't want me but she wants m

12/14/2016 5:26:12 PM
Mistress a Rachel is slowly building me up to an event out in the real world, I am terrified and excited. I love the way she relaxes me and her advice is invaluable.Mistress a Rachel is slowly building me up to an event out in the real world, I am terrified a

5/24/2016 9:52:47 AM
I know that was you.Collarspace.com - The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

    


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