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So much has changed since my last writing. I have grown so much in my life. The past year has had the most profound and painful lessons. I have learned my anxiety to please and make sure everything is perfect caused alot of undue stress in my D/s relationships. I know this lesson is a very important one. I know that my worth has nothing to do with my submission. I could list all the lessons I have learned ...
I am hopeful and happy. I found out I had uterine cancer in june. I am cancer free they got it all. It was all contained in the lady parts. Surgery in july and they found a second type. I have always been an over achiever. My vanilla guy I was seeing broke up with me three days after my hysterectomy. Nice guy right. I feel so much better and I am moving forward and going to enjoy the journery. So hear is to all of us finding what we desire
Blessed |
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novel approach
To become friends with a Dom. Lets see if there is enough for us to be friends and build on it from there. Get to know each other see if we share similar interests. It is good to have similar interest and also interests that we don't share. Life is about the experiences that people bring together. Be a gentleman. Don't even come and say on your knees or how I will be trained to be something I am not. I am not new to this lifestyle Don't waste my time or yours by trying to make me something I do not desire to become. Yes I am submissive that does not mean our desires are a match.
blessed |
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How does one keep their heart open when life keeps closing it. Lessons in life are meant to teach us something. I still seek a Gentleman Dom. Please understand I have my limits and ways that I live my life and I am the hopeless romantic that still keeps the desire to serve and find the man whom I am meant to serve. Please feel free to ask me anything.
blessed |
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Hope or faith or powers of the universe
just when you think you have given up. You find something to not make you give up. NO NO NO. I have not found someone. I just am keeping my window open so to speak.
I don not suffer fools lightly.
blessed |
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Just because I write about what I am looking for does not give ANYONE the right to think I am going to just drop to my knees and serve. What I seek comes in time with trust and we both earn the others D or S. Dont tell me I lost my choice when I put my profile up. I am full of logic and reason. I am real I just am really sick of the shit on here. DONT APPROCH ME BY BEING RUDE AND ALL STUCK ON THE FACT YOU ARE A DOM. You are not my Dom. So dont write me fuckin bull shit. I have had enough to last a life time. Many of the ladies here have.
Yes I am looking, However, the idiots who send the stupid emails on your knees bitch to me Fuck off. Yes I am pissed and tired of the bull shit. You feel you want a wonderful submisive who will serve you well. Then bring your A to Z game because you have to understand I have been in the life style a lot of years. I am not some woman who has read a shade of Grey. I have served long term and short term.
You want to get to know me. I am a person. Send a nice email. I want a Master a friend a partner in crime. So Gentleman who send ladies on the site emails. know the lady you are sending the email to. READ her profile and journal entries if she has them. If something is a hard limit than respect that.
Yes I am single and hope to find the Dom of my desires and me to be his.
You can be polite and respectful and that shows me you are more of a Dom than the wanker who sends the stupid emails to me
blessed |
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Just because I am kinky
Yes I am kinky. NO that does not give anyone the right to treat me with any less respect. If you would not approach someone in the vanilla world like that, than don't do it here with me. I am a lot more than the sum of my kinks. You want to get to know me. Hear a few pointer
NO cock shots. Really some people lead with that.
NO Send me a phone of you nude or in bra and panties. I don't do that for anyone.
Just because I am a submissive I am NOT yours just because you send me a note.
I have morals and values and just because you have a dick DONT BE ONE.
I am worth getting to know.
blessed |
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This i found on line. It fits me so well.
Be as soft as the world will let me be, and as hard as it makes me be In the right context I can be soft in submission. He would make sure I did not have to be hard in the world.
I dont need to be micro managed. It is about being able to focus on his needs as he takes care of the "other" things in life so I can focus on him.
Trust me I can shoulder to shoulder with the strongest of people. It is not my core. I am not weak in mind, spirit or body.
My submission in not a matter of weakness. My submission is a matter of grace and trust and the exchange that the Sir takes care of so much. In my submission i have freedom. I take great pride in being able to please and being pleasing. In the exchange i want to show that great care and desire to show how much being able to serve the right Sir.
Oh this great lesson came with the worst type of pain and loss. I was at my own doing. Such a high price to pay. I am not being a maytyr. It is my truth.
blessed |
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give it a try, whispers the heart. WHY, asked logic. Dont, says reason, Stop the torment, cried her soul
blessed |
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TOday I turn 49. I am happy with my age and shape and such.
I got a card and it made me cry because it made me wonder why life is so difficult in finding someone, the card read
Once upon a time, ther was this person who came into the world in the ordinary way.
And everyday that person learned a little more and grew a little more.
That person had talents and gifts and thoughts and ideas like nobody else.
That perosn had love to give and happiness to share.
And that person made a difference in other people's lives every single day.
So, as it turns out, the day that person came into the world wasnt ordinary at all.
It was the biginnign of the unique and important life of the extraordianry you.
So what will the next 49 years bring???? I dont know but look out world.
blessed |
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New profile written and yes that is me in the photo. I have been talking with old friends from the flea and they have hepled me see what i seek. |
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Back from the flea. got a new corset and skirt. had fun seeing old friends
blessed |
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Off to the Fetish Fair Flea. Stay kinky my friends
Blessed |
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Look out life here I come. I have been distracted by something major for the last few weeks. I no long am distracted. If i sent an email that was rude I am sorry.
blessed |
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Every morning give life a chance to begin anew. There is hope in every day.
blessed |
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I used to say I was beyond redemption. After some thoughts and very much soul searching. I dont think there is a part of my soul I have not searched atleast 3 times.
I now feel that it will be aquired redemption. Yes that is what my submission is to me. With the right Master it will be aquired with time and his guidence. I have much to learn and eveyday is a journey.
blessed
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Beauty of a woman is in her obedience
Why is it at times so hard to be obedient. My life my career requires has required at times to make choices, hard choices, on the spot. I have tried and tried, prayed for the strenght to be more obedient and I still fail. I know that i need to keep working on this. Blessed |
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I found this on fet life. If you understand this than you know what I am looking for. I have the highest of standards. Yes my submission is as high as my standards
Please allow me to kneel.
I need to kneel.
Please allow me to kneel before you,
Naked and exposed,
Not because I am lesser than
But because I know you accept me as I am.
Please allow me to kneel before you,
Head to the floor,
Not because you are greater than
But because I need to become small again.
Allow me to kneel
Not because I worship you
But because I recognize your strength:
Your ability to contain,
To hold my power for me.
Allow me to subjugate myself
Not because you need control
But because control will not corrupt you:
Your compassion sustains;
You will ensure my well-being.
Allow me to perform obeisance
Not because you demand it
But because I need it:
The release, the relief, the renunciation of my will,
The return to unique insignificance.
Please allow me to kneel before you
In a world where gods are human
Because I need to remember
The stars in relation to my existence.
Please allow me to kneel before you
When the divine is oft ignored
Because you are courageous
Enough to reject the seduction of its mantle.
I need to submit.
Please accept my submission.
********
© 2014 All rights reserved.
You may reproduce or distribute
with attribution to @LovingHeart on FetLife
for non-commercial purposes only.
******** |
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What do i seek.
A gentleman with a good heart and a kinky side.
I am a lady in public
a cook in the kitchen
and a cherished slut in the bedroom
sounds simple enough right.
I have a strong persona. I am a business woman. I have said i am very different when trust is earned and my submissive side comes out. My submission is not for, nor needs to be for public display.
What I have done in my past is the past and private for myself and for the person i enjoyed the kink with. As the say a Lady does not kiss and tell.
Blessed |
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Such an exciting day. Not really. I am doing my ironing. YES i do iron. I have forgotten what a BITCH silk is to iron. Give me good old fashion cotton with spray starch. Last weekend it was polishing my shoes. Only error i made was using the black finish brush on my nude shoes. Well redid them and they look great. I know these are skills that seemed to be lost in a few generations. I buy good dress shoes that are leather and do take care of them myself. When tap comes off the bottom I take them to the cobbler.
Well all the buttons that needed to be sew back on are also done.
I know such exciting stuff. All kidding aside if feels good to get this stuff done
blessed |
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Life is about learning. Yes there are alot of things I have tried and enjoy for kink. Get to know me. I work for myself and I need to have a strong persona for that. MY submission is given as we would get to know each other. One must remember the old saying and it fits well with what I seek, and who i am and want to be come more refined at
Cook in the kitchen. You would not starve. Lets cook together. You cook for me I will be happy to clean the kitchen. I love to try different types of food. Picnic in the park, on the beach. In the living room during a power outage.
Lady in the Palor. Yes lady in public. Was raised that way will always be that way. I dress well in clothes that fit well. Classy, Elegant, yes and turn alot of heads. Yes I do always look nice when I go out.
Wanton woman in the bedroom. Now there, to become the one who I will serve, to be his cherished slut. For his pleasure only
Blessed |
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the ring I am wearing in the photo is a family ring from my aunt. I wear it sometimes. yes it was her wedding set. rest her soul
blessed |
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I leaned something new today. Very important. I don't have limits I have considerations. I agree with the person who took the time to explain that to me.
You can learn something new every day.
thank you to the person who took the time to explain and teach me the difference
blessed |
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There is nothing greater than an HONEST man who says what needs to be said even if it hurts someone. Give me the truth and I will take it like a lady.
Blessed |
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This is the first holiday season I don't have my father. he passed away 2/24/14. God I miss him so much. He was funny and a southern gentleman.
blessed |
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We lost power at 7:30pm last night and it just came on about 20 minutes ago. Pushed back dinner but that is ok.
Thanksgiving has never really been a big holiday since i became a nurse and worked it so i could have christmas off when my son was little.
So happy thanksgiving and enjoy the day and family and friend
blessed |
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Making pies today for thanksgiving. Yes from scratch.
mincemeat. yuk but a dear friend likes it
apple
cocconut cream
key lime.
love to bake. I dont eat much of what i cook anymore. Staying a slim ladies size 4-6 is much more important than a piece of pie
hope eveyone has a lovely thankgiving. Perhaps next year will be differernt
Blessed
ps forgot the pumpkin pie |
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Spent the afternoon cleaning and polishing my shoes and mending clothes. Would have been a perfect afternoon if I was sitting at the feet of a Sir. Perfection would have been doing his shoes.
blessed |
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With the right Master, i can share a devotion that radiates from the core of my being. |
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