4/8/2024 10:01:21 AM: Been a while, lots going on! Some really exciting prospaspects coming up so ready to see where this path goes!   on the journey, I'm down under 220... I feel infinitely stronger than I was before and I think I'm going to just have to keep this up! lol I set a new personal record on snatches at 165 for 3 reps! I don't think I could lift that over my head even when I was younger and in good shape so yay!   on the search for the right boy... well let's just say flakes abound and I'm almost over it... oh well...     on an extremely personal level i had something I never expected to happen happen to me (advice appreciated)... I spent 16 years wondering who my birth father was, 3(ish) months trying to build a bridge between us, and 32 years trying to forget... a little over 2 months ago he reached out to me (first time ever) three weeks ago it was 'hey really wanna meet with you, just say when and where and I'll be there...' so I told him Monday 1pm at my bar...  *crickets*  I haven't reached out or anything but I really wanna be petty and post how I feel while tagging him since he reached out to me via facebook... I'm turning 49 in just over a week, ive survived this long with out him... maybe I should give up and walk away? Any thoughts?

2/8/2024 12:35:49 PM: Well it's been a while since I updated any of this...   weightloss journey: grrrrr the working out is working so is the dieting... but the consistency hasn't been there this past month or so... gotta work on that stop letting work etc get in my way   the whole heart failure thing... okay I'm probably gonna get flavk for this but I haven't been to cardiology nor on meds for the past 2 years when I moved from MO to KS I lost my insurance and was dropped instantly by cardiologist- I felt so... devalued like I was just a dollar sign not a human with a treatable condition... now I'm ba k in MO about to get my insurance back and will be going to the doctor again, perhaps at a different facility...

11/28/2023 2:21:00 PM: Wow... so stupid,passed on because I refuse to get skype or or anything else... my guess, I didn't miss much... I seriously question why people complain about their search not going well while pulling stunts like this...   'I love everything about your profile! You have Skype? No? Well good luck' I guess ya didn't like it enough to talk with me through the available mediums...

11/15/2023 1:08:59 PM: why do people play these stupid games... I thought I had an interested (local) sub that wanted my ideal D/s relationship... well... he decided he's '...too pretty to be a sub, and wants to go to California to get with a modeling agency...' I didn't tell him that I used to model and stilll have connections... why should I? I thanked him for leading me on and blocked him on all media... Okay that's over... was back at the gym today for the first time in a bit, lot's going on and been sick so BOO!!!!! Did dead lifts for the first time in a long time (maybe 2-3 months?) 235 pound, 5 reps... not bad still not back up to my record but not bad! Left the gym, went to the grocery store (I see enchiladas in my future...) and came home only to find myself bored... I made my drag performer friend a mix, then decided today was a good day to make BBQ Sauce... oooops... 3 kinds... BBQ, Sweet & Spicy, and Hot... my son came by as I was just starting so I had him help... he's jealous that he can't take any home with him... oh well... time to find my next project... maybe I'll go out back and get that firepit started...

11/10/2023 11:31:36 AM: Well it's been a bit but I'm still here... I know, darn! LolI've been busy the rodeo royalty competition was a bust and very anger inducing not because I lost, because the individual who won used a racial slur against another person in the competition and was not only allowed to continue the competition but won?!?!?!??!!!! Yeah... you can see where this doesn't set well... I've been nominated for the vice president position of my association but don't think I want it... I'm debating a hiatus, I think I'm due the break... the working out has been not as steady no thanks to illnesses and injuries but regardless I am still working out 3-4 times weekly... yeah I'm still determined