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KimberlyAnneG

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Friends:
HewhocaresColLingusDomineasttnWhiteLotus72

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First and foremost, I am seeking friendships. If anything comes of that down the road then so be it. I am a firm believer in Everything happens for a reason and in its own time.



A dip into reality here. Im not looking for a hook-up, casual sex encounter, to be and follow someone blindly. I want a relationship where my partner gets the various aspects that make up me. Someone who respects my limits, my goals, and aspirations. Someone who I can grow with. Share with. And ultimately love.


The kink is fine. But I want the relationship first. Im not here to fuck folks. Know me for me, not what I get off on.

Sexual conversations inside a certain timeframe will get shut down period.







Updated 5-28-18

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8/17/2022 2:13:44 AM

I've got some off time.  But next week it is back to 6 days a week.  

 

I still wonder what it is with folks.  If you want to talk fine.  Im down with that.  I enjoy meeting new people and potentially making friends.  However... don't make promisses you have no intention of keeping.  Again, I can't say this enough, grow up and if the person you are talking to just isnt relationship material, tell them.  Do not just ghost them.  Its cruel.  

Yes this is a "fetish" site.  Yes, some get off on cruel acts committed to them. But prolonged mental cruelty will ruin a person.  

I miss the good ole days.  When if you had a problem with someone, you just told them and if it could be worked out, you did so. If not you walked away and left it alone.  If you were not interested in someone, you just told them. Not ghost them and leaving them wondering what they did wrong.  You got to know a person, the real person before jumping into commitments.  And a whole lot more.  

What is worse, I have seen this behavior more and more from Gen X and later.  What the hell?  

Everyone has their fantasies.  Their dreams and desires.  Everyone has their own idea on what and how this lifestyle is and should be.  However, at the end of the day, we are human beings.  Lets start there and start acting like it.  


7/3/2022 1:22:52 PM

A small respite is coming, but it wont last long then it will be back to OT and I will watch my summer disappear.

 

Little heads up to anyone who may even remotely care.  Folks need to grow up.  If you are not into a person, then dont lead them on only to just poof one day with no explaination.  

I will not be the one to text first normally.  Nor will I be up all night chatting.  My sleep schedule just does not permit it.  If you truly are interested, then make sure I know it.  Dont think if your coming for a visit, you will be staying with me.  Not happening like that.  We have a little hotel just up the road.  I wont be putting miles on my Jeep traveling a thousand miles unless I am headed home.  

Often times I wonder why I even log in any more.  I have people who just dont get my job or schedule that comes with it right now.  They dont gr that I just am not a huggy cuddly person.  Even to the point of telling me "but your a woman".  What does that have to do with the price of biscuits?  I like my alone time just as much as I enjoy good company.  My traditional upbringing often wars with the lifestyle.  My geographical culture shock wars with where I really am from.  

And people ask why I am so guarded.  What is the point of opening up and feeling anything for someone only for them to just disappear?  So if we talk for an extended period and I am just not emotional, sorry but not sorry.  I wont continue to live that shit.


5/7/2022 3:20:55 PM

I am tired.  I am wore slap out already.  

Working 10- 12 hour days.. Six days a week and four hours the seventh.  It has gotten old very quickly while I wait for bosses to make decisions on who will be my next assistant without consideration from me.  

The stress of work, the stress of house, has me completely blown out.  I collapse into exhausted sleep every evening now, while thoughts of work and how I will have the energy to get the most simple of things done at house that I need to get taken care of.  

These are my days right now.  

So forgive me if I get a little on edge when the word fun is thrown at me like a ball to my dog.  I dont have time for fun. I have a department to run.  I couldnt care less about fun.  I care about making it through the next day with hopefully a little less stress than the last.  I care about making it through my contract so I can get my rearend home where I will be happier.  

Fun is good and all, but it is not the focus of my life.  It is not the focus of what I want in a relationship.  

Sorry for the rant y'all.  I am just so tired of hearing... what are you doing fun tonight or well thats no fun.  Shaking my head.  I am beginning to detest that word with a passion.


3/17/2022 6:19:05 AM

It has been a while, and a lot has happened.

I moved to NY.  Now stuck here due to a contract I signed with my job.  Oh how I miss home.  Soon to be alone again.  Not because of a relationship, but because of other reasons, ask me Ill share no problem.  I now often wonder what kind of spiral that is going to send me into.

Such is life I guess.  Work, Karma, work, fur kids, work.... Such is life right now.  Is there a respite out there somewhere?


4/4/2018 1:56:09 AM
Aggression is not something I act/react well to. I have a life. I work hard and often go home with bruises, burns, and very sore muscles. This often means I am tired when I get home. I crash early because of my job. It also means, I won't be up all night chatting. I can't and be worth a damn at work. I am human. I have feelings, goals, and such. I will not squash those to fit another person. And, yeah, there is a definite reason my "kinks" aren't listed. Know me for me, not what I get off on.

4/3/2018 1:41:20 AM
There are some, that no matter what, no matter how hard you try to protect yourself, they can shake you to your very core. Take a jackhammer to your personal foundation. Leaving you shaken and questioning.

3/20/2018 3:57:06 PM
The sky is growing dark with storm clouds and the wind picking up. Kind of matches my mood about now. We are in for a cold night. Oh, how I wish Mother Nature would make up her mind.

3/19/2018 4:12:22 PM
I'm tired, so very tired. Sometimes I wonder how a person can get this tired. Sure I am physically tired. That is an everyday thing. And I am pretty sure that if I buy new shoes, some of the pain will subside. It is the mental and emotional daily drain that is the worst. It wears one down, and makes it hard for them to fight off the physical pain. I asked someone today, why so many come to me...their reply was simple, because I listen impartially. Im tired of listening. For a while, I just wish, I was on the other side, just for a bit. Perhaps then I wouldn't be so tired, if just for a little bit.

1/14/2018 8:12:57 AM

The sun has broken the horizon to a very crisp and clear sky.  As I sit here drinking my morning coffee by the window, looking out upon a lightly frosted ground, dark clouds threaten to pass across this soul.

I received a phone call this morning which has me in a bit of conflict.  It came from my ride or die/best bud/adopted son depending on what day and the need.  He gave me some news which conflicts me.  As it is, some days I wonder if he will be just another to drive away up that country road and never to be seen or heard from again because my usefulness has been used up.  Such is life, people come into our lives and leave regularly, very few actually stay for the long haul.  Then there are those, who you have had an entire lifetime, who when they leave, we miss beyond measure, especially in times of conflict as their counsel is no longer there for us to lean on and gain strength from.

The foot that is attached to the body kicking the dog can only do so, so many times before the dog either lays down and dies or rises and bites.  It matters not if that body has fed that dog, or given it any sort of affection.  If it kicks long enough, the dog will either break or bite.  Unfortunate in today's society, often the dog is put down without further investigation.  Without finding out if it is merely a trait of the dog or if something over time prompted the dog to retaliate.

We have a direct impact on up to thousands of people a day.  A mere smile to a stranger.  An unkind word or gesture.  All impact hundreds if not thousands of people each and every day.  How we act and react, not only affects ourselves, but others as well.  Something which is regularly forgotten in this day and age.

While this may seem to be an entry which bounces, I assure you, everything here is most definitely connected.

As I watch the sun warm the ground and melt the frost, I feel the frost and deep sadness fills my heart for my boy.  I feel for my boy, what he is going through.  His tone told me everything.  You see he is that man.  The man who can be the biggest asshole on the planet, but if you take the time to dig, he can be one of the most caring there is.  He just doesn't know how to show it or often chooses not to.  The image portrayed is the armor which keeps him safe.

You see, while I feel for him, I find myself feeling absolutely nothing but an icy chill for the person he called me about this morning.  Two conflicting emotions which clash wildly within.  And I sit wondering why or even how, with my counsel gone and my mind reeling trying to grasp what would be said to lend firm ground to stand upon.

You can only wench someone out of a mud-hole so many times before the wench cable snaps and the dog bites back.  Lucky for us humans, we have a solid voice to explain ourselves, unlike that dog.  And you can help someone so long before you say enough is enough.  You cannot truly help someone if they refuse to help themselves.

While the tears flow for my boy and his family, I have nothing but ice for the one who caused this grief.  Two very different and conflicting emotions which has caused a very unstable foundation to try standing upon.

Were this individual in front of me at the moment, I would tell him:  "I hope you are happy now you selfish, narcissistic, prick, bastard.  Once again you have left a swath of destruction in your wake for everyone else to clean up because you were too much of a coward to stand up.  Instead you chose to cling to every excuse you could find to remain in your ditch to gain and remain the center of attention.  I hope now, you see.  Little too late though isn't it."

The dark clouds have gathered, and the thunder now rages.  I can but sit and watch the frost melt, shake my head and wonder why.


1/13/2018 9:49:54 AM
Feeling a bit better, but its a process.  Especially when you are recovering and those around you are sick, yikes.  

btw... Yes I do have skype (Alendralar).  If you hit it though, let me know who you are, that you are from here, and your profile name... please.  If not, I wont answer.

Hope everyone is staying warm.

1/4/2018 8:37:39 AM
My apologies for not answsering mail.  I am not feeling well and am taking a few days off line/unplugged to recoup.

Will answer everyone this weekend as time allows.  Being sick is no fun and it puts everything behind.

Hope everyone is staying warm and cozy.



1/1/2018 6:01:12 AM
I want to start by wishing everyone a very Happy New Year.

As I watch the sun rise on not just a new day, but new year, I find myself in a bit of reflection.  Not a dwelling reflection, but one of just looking back over the year and seeing where I have come and gone.  It is not always an easy thing to do, but one which is necessary for my personal growth.  

Am I completely happy with this last year? No, not by any means.  I have been through some things that looking back could have been prevented.  However, as they were, it is a lesson learned which is one for the history books and hopefully not repeated.  I am focused on moving forward, not backwards.

I am not one for resolutions.  Find them frivolous, and while they may be good starting points for some, things which tend to be passed over and often forgotten by my birthday, which is early in the year.  I am however one for setting short term goals which are but puzzle pieces for bigger goals.  For instance, I lost a lot this last two years.  Things which may or may not be paramount to my survival, but they do lend a hand in my overall comforts.  I also moved, and my cottage needs some much needed TLC.  In order for me to better obtain and do the things I desire, a job shift is in order.  More financial stability means I can obtain those things.  It means I can give my cottage the TLC it deserves and turn it into the sanctuary I desire for my utmost mental and emotional comfort.  You get the picture.  I do wish those who do believe in them, the best of luck in the coming year.  

One thing which has been on my mind of late, is how some perceive me.  Or approach me.  I am not one or the other (Dom/Sub), I am both and then some.  Most importantly, I am a woman first and foremost.  I have the most base woman's desires, and I am not merely talking sexual.  I desire to be held, kissed, listened to, supported (mentally/emotionally), etc.  Just as there are times when I need to revert and have Daddy scoop me up.  These things come first with me.  I am far from perfect, after all I am human.  I hate shopping (*gasp* a woman who hates shopping, go figure), I like things simple, I love my sweats and Camo, Iffy on cooking, cant stand spotless, love my animals, etc.  Is it to much to ask for the most base needs met first prior to any others?

Is it so strange that I don't find jealousy appealing in either a male or female?  Is it so out there that I firmly believe that there is absolutely no way for a person to find 100% of their perceived ideal mate?  Am I so off in my desire to feed all aspects of myself?

Just some random thoughts passing through the brainpan on this New Years morn.

Hope everyone has a safe day.   





12/30/2017 5:01:33 PM
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. 2018 fast approaches. I look forward to it with optomism and apprehension.

6/28/2016 8:06:15 PM
Well, some time has passed and much has happened.  But alas, work has ruled, and that is where I spend a good portion of my time.  Not always because I have to, but because I choose to.  Albeit, this week is "Hell Week" with store rides.  Just a bit of pressure that was unneeded, but will be dealt with accordingly.

I am too old to be playing games.  Especially those involving holding your hand and stroking your insecure ego while you think more of yourself than you really are.  

The top question posed to me of late, what are you looking for?
That comes with a complex answer.  I am not looking for someone to lock me into a singular role for starters.  I am not singular.  I am looking for friends with like interests.  I do not expect us to agree on everything, that goes against human nature.  But at least try to understand me for me.

Some days I really wonder why I bother and just don't make work my Master/Submissive/Daddy.  

hmm, clue there folks.

6/5/2016 10:50:53 AM
Good afternoon everyone.

My apologies for not responding to mail until this morning.  Life has taken its toll and well, to be honest, responsibilities are just that.  I have tried to respond to everyone, if I missed your mail, forgive me.  I will go over things again tonight when I get off work and tomorrow, my only day off this week and try and catch up.

Hope everyone is doing well.  And hope to catch up with friends soon.

Enjoy the day everyone... I'm off to work.

4/15/2016 5:50:02 AM
There truly is nothing like waking in the morning, taking that first cup of coffee out to the back porch while the sun is barely cresting the horizon.  When the world is still, for the most part quiet, even the birds haven't rustled their feathers for the first time yet.  

To watch the world come alive truly is a wondrous thing.  When the remaining fog hints at the secrets of the night just past.  The suns first rays, touching the ground exposing what lays in wait, or does it?

10/27/2013 1:23:54 PM

All of us are comprised of intricate little puzzle pieces which make up the whole of who we are.  Just because you do not "see" or been shown a certain thing within a person, does not mean it is not there.  There could be any number of reason why you have not been shown.  Either that, or you have been too blind to see it when its smacked you up side your head.  So little comments like "I've not seen that in you" or "I don't believe you would do that" or and this is my favorite "you've always been a good slave to me" do nothing more than show me you are seeing what you want to see and as I said are either blind or in denial.

When you pick up something that bothers your "intended", why push it knowing it will upset the other person?  Why is it so unimportant to not remember key pieces of a persons story, making you reenter the realm of discomfort for that person or just out and out pissing them off because they are having to repeat themselves.  Or is it a case you either have memory issues (don't play this card too often boys, I do not buy into excuses), or are just so flat selfish that you don't give a damn?

Why are so many assumptions made?  OCD is not something which is enjoyable for everyone who suffers it.  So focusing there because you know your house will be kept clean, etc. is selfish and actually an assumption that it comes from the "intendeds" desire to please you.  OCD is an issue which plagues the sufferer, sometimes making them crazy until their list is completed for the day.  It is not a positive attitude towards you.  

Unless it has been discussed and agreed upon, I have a name!  At this point in time, NO ONE has a "collar" around my neck.  NO ONE has absolute control of this switch.  Therefore I have a name and would appreciate it used instead of "title".  Just because I have shown you my submissive even slave sides, does not mean that is now my name.  If you can't remember my name, then maybe you should just move along now.  Because if you cant use it now, you sure in the hell won't use it when I need you to the most.

Every so called "date" we are on, is not going to be an over night serve you fuck fest.  I have responsibilities.  I have things I want to do.  In a nutshell, if you want the heart to go with the other, you better be prepared to cater to the NILLA first and foremost.  I like sex as well as the next person, but dayum!

Right now, I have a mother load of tensions in my "normal" life.  I do not need more from someone else, or someone else who cant assist me in relaxation or solutions.  I have ways which have been proven time and again to help me relax.  "subspace" is only temporary.  Going out is only temporary and once my mind tracks back around, I will not be "distracted" for an entire weekend no matter how much you desire it.  

Chances are, if you have seriously talked to me, spent any amount of time with me whether it be via chat and/or in person, you have "met" the dominant and/or baby girl sides to me.  Be honest with yourself, did you even see them?  Did you even know how to deal with them?  If not, you might want to really consider reevaluating yourself.

And just to be clear here... NO I will not be relocating.  I like where I live.  I have responsibilities here.  I have developed friendships here.  I like being this close to some of my favorite places.  This also means that NO I will not be cohabitating with anyone once I get completely established for some time.  And to add to that, when I do find a place, no it does not mean anyone will be moving right in.  It also does not mean anyone but my name will be on my residence.  Get the picture?  No relocating, no you wont be moving right in and hell no you will not have your name on my residence.  Hmm, not very sub/slave like now is it?

I've got a motherload of red flags from a few quarters cropping up.  I'm not liking it.  

P.S.  If you have talked to me for any length of time and still don't know what I like to do, eat, hobbies, or some of my favorite things are, do you not think there is something wrong with that picture, especially if you are dead set on "claiming" me for your own?

 

 

 


10/22/2013 3:07:57 PM

Ok, I know that guys like blow jobs.  I get that, heck I enjoy having oral done on me too.  But dang, come on when it comes to be priority even when attempting to have a conversation in which you are supposed to be learning your "partner" and/or what ever you want to call it, your thinking more about a blow job than what is going on?  

 

When did this so called "lifestyle" become more about sex than actually a relationship?  Am about fed up.


10/20/2013 7:27:27 AM

Hell Week On Horizon.

 

I am coming into finals week for this session in school.  So I will not be able to be as quick on responses.  

 

Wish me luck!


10/17/2013 10:41:36 AM

What the hell?  I thought I had put right at the top that friendship.  Does not friendship start "nilla"?  So why are my "lifestyle" things more important? 

 

Some folks need to get a grip.


10/2/2013 10:20:04 PM

I wish to say good night to everyone and wish everyone a restful night and wonderful day tomorrow.  

 

I will answer any missed messages tomorrow.  

 

Thank You.  

 

G'night all!


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TheLadyFae
 
 Age: 23
 Mount sterling, Illinois